WEST

St. Louis no ones vs. San Jose no ones

Vancouver Vanamondes vs. L.A. no ones
-If Los Angeles wins, Van must watch “L.A. Story” or “Born in East L.A.”

Phoenix Desert Pixies vs. Chicago Energizer Bunnies
-If Chicago wins, then Desert Pixie must watch “Hudson Hawk” or “Head (The Monkees movie)”
-If Phoenix wins, TEB must watch “The Cutting Edge” or “The Phoenix Lights (documentary)”

Detroit Rhettros vs. Nashville Jack Mangans
-If Nashville wins, Rhettro must watch “The Dukes of Hazzard (2005)” or “Predators”
-If Detroit wins, Jack must watch “Doctor Detroit” or “Robocop 3” (or alt.: “Nevermore: Year of the Voyager“)

EAST
New York Lo Pans vs. Ottawa UsedHairs
-If Ottawa wins, then Lo Pan must watch “Jesus Christ, Vampire Hunter” or “Cop and a Half”
-If New York wins, then UsedHair must watch “Maid in Manhattan” or “Warriors”
Pittsburgh Cynfuls vs. Philadelphia no ones
-If Philadelphia wins, then Cynful must watch “Rocky Balboa” or “The Village”
Boston dittos vs. Washington EssBees
-If Washington wins, then ditto must watch “Pecker” or “The X-Files”
-If Boston wins, then EssBee must watch “Summer Wars” or “Memento”
Florida Amy Bowens vs. New Jersey Jack Mangans
-If New Jersey wins, then Amy must watch “Legend (Tom Cruise, Tim Curry)” or “Jersey Girl (Ben Affleck)”
-If Florida wins, then Jack must bitterly watch “Cocoon” or “Miami Vice” (or alt.: “Willard“)

Sorry for the crappy formatting.

Deadpan Playoff Chart [Movie suggestions in brackets]
EAST : : Participant : : Movie : : Alt Movie
New York Rangers : : : : : Lo Pan : : Maid in Manhattan : : Warriors (1970s)
Pittsburgh Penguins : : : : Cynful : : Brutal Beauty: Rose City Rollers : : Colin & Brad: Two Men Group
Boston Bruins : : : : : : : ditto : : Summer Wars : : Memento
Philadelphia Flyers : : : : UNCLAIMED : : [Rocky Balboa (Rocky 6)] : : [The Village (M. Night Shyamalanangdanioan)]
New Jersey Devils : : : : Jack Mangan : : Legend (The Tom Cruis one) : : Jersey Girl (The Ben Affleck one)
Florida Panthers : : : : Amy Bowen : : [Cocoon] : : [Miami Vice], [Willard (the rat movie)]
Ottawa Senators : : : : UsedHair : : Jesus Christ, Vampire Hunter : : [Cop and a Half]
Washington Capitals : : EssBee : : Pecker : : The X-Files

WEST : : Participant : : Movie : : Alt Movie
St. Louis Blues : : : : UNCLAIMED : : [Crossroads (Ralph Macchio)] : : [Blue Velvet]
Vancouver Canucks : : : : Vanamonde The Last Starfighter The Black Hole
Detroit Red Wings : : : Rhettro : : Doctor Detroit : : Robocop 3, Nevermore: Year of the Voyager
Nashville Predators : : Jack Mangan : : [Dukes of Hazzard (2005)] : : [Predators]
Chicago Blackhawks : : The Energizer Bunny : : Hudson Hawk : : Head (The Monkees)
San Jose Sharks : : : UNCLAIMED : : [Swimming With Sharks (Kevin Spacey)] : : [Deep Blue Sea]
Phoenix Coyotes : : : Desert Pixie : : The Cutting Edge : : The Phoenix Lights (docu)
Los Angeles Kings : : UNCLAIMED : : [L.A. Story] : : [Born in East L.A.]

The Deadline is Wednesday to choose your team!
Unclaimed are:

Pittsburgh Penguins
Philadelphia Flyers
Florida Panthers
Washington Capitals
St. Louis Blues
Nashville Predators
San Jose Sharks
Los Angelee Kings

If you have a team, then make sure you have 2 movies. I’ll do that chart soon.

Raise a root beer today for Our Missing Ninja – – and brilliant friend, Joe Murphy.

Remembering Joe

Of all the souls I have encountered in my travels, his was the most human.

So here’s the deal.
The 2011-2012 NHL Playoffs are coming up. This season’s 16 top teams will compete in an elimination tournament for the ultimate prize in sports: The Stanley Cup.

How Deadpan will get in on it:
Each participant will choose one of the 16 playoff teams. They’ll then choose a well-known, easily-accessible movie for their team.* If their team is eliminated, then they must watch the movie selected by their opponent. If their team wins, then their opponent must watch the movie they selected.

Whoever watches a movie because of a hockey loss will send related audio of less than 5 minutes to me, to be played on a future Deadpan episode. The audio can be a film review, a brief play-by-play, fanfic, whatever. Creativity is encouraged.

*Nothing beyond MPAA Rated R, please. . . And please go easy on the gore/ smut. Not everyone can tolerate “Ichi the Killer.” Select an alternate movie choice too.
It’s not mandatory, but it’d be nice if the movie(s) had *some* kinda link to the team, e.g.: The Omen for the New Jersey Devils, Wayne’s World for the Chicago Blackhawks, Cloverfield for the New York Rangers, etc.

Clear as ice? In years past, the losing player had to perform the winning team’s song; this year, we’re trying out movies.

Example: Link’s team is the Columbus Blue Jackets, and he’s chosen “The Goonies” as the team movie, with “Major League” as the backup choice. Zelda’s team is the New York Islanders, and she’s chosen “Shutter Island,” with “Private Parts” as her backup. New York defeats Columbus in the playoffs, so Link must watch “Shutter Island.” If he can’t, then he can watch “Private Parts.”

(We have 7 confirmed right now. This works best with at least 12 participants.)

The “Really Big Things” serial was a Deadpan staple for over a year, delighting us with the strangest assortment of characters, locales, podfamous guest stars, and landmarks ever heard onpod. Author Paul Maki wove a twisting, twisted tale, combining horror, comedy, suspense, and absurdity into one Really Big story. The series had been spread across a number of Deadpan episodes, but now, for the first time, is available in one .zip file.

Download Paul Maki’s “Really Big Things Serial here.

“Quitting Time” comes first.

That sounded way too much like a commercial. Act now! The first 100 callers will get a free Big Thing!*

*Offer void.

Anyway, thanks Paul Maki for the link and the coolness. The download is free, by the way, just in case that wasn’t clear. .

Attention, internet-viewer. You are forbidden to view this website or any of its content because a post, podcast episode, comment, or section of embedded code somewhere at this web location may contain content, a link to content, or mention of content here or elsewhere that is – – intentionally or unintentionally – – engaged in the illegal use of copyrighted materials, potentially seditious, detrimental, or dangerous speech or ideas, or potentially offensive images, words, noises, odors, or concepts. By clicking any further links or accessing any further addresses connected to this website, you are freely associating yourself with whatever illegal or inappropriate matter may or may not be contained here, and you will be held fully accountable for your complicity with possible criminal activity. A full investigation of this site shall be conducted in due process, and once its legality has been ascertained beyond a shadow of any doubt, then it will naturally be free to resume its typical activities.

In the meantime, you are encouraged to continue your daily activities as normal, contributing labor to the daily cause of great American Capitalism. You are free to leave this potentially disruptive web address and exercise your consumer freedom to spend as much as you wish in American retail, dining, and entertainment locations, or even merchant websites that have already been approved as compliant with all U.S. Federal regulations, and thereby funding and strengthening American industries. You are also free to enjoy any and all approved pay and free, advertisement-funded media.

For more information:
http://blog.reddit.com/2012/01/technical-examination-of-sopa-and.html
http://www.forbes.com/sites/johngaudiosi/2012/01/16/obama-says-so-long-sopa-killing-controversial-internet-piracy-legislation/
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2012/01/how-pipa-and-sopa-violate-white-house-principles-supporting-free-speech

The last unshow of January? Not ready yet for a talkie …. this one is silent.