362 thoughts on “Unshow Numero Ocho

  1. No, today’s weather colour is “it’s 4:50AM, and I have to either run the snowblower or shovel the drive and the walk because our house is a place of business,” or “grrr” for short.

  2. One more, then I have to go for brekkie with my Boo:

    Tennis players shouldn’t marry because Love means Nothing to them.

    Back in a bit!

  3. My Boo is still dragging her carcass out of bed:

    Pinocchio was in love with a girl. Many people said it wasn’t true. But I know, he loved her as much as a real boy wood.

  4. Don’t forget, if you and your loved one are apart today, you should drink a strong green alcohol. Absenth makes the heart grow stronger.

  5. Odd morning commute, in the last week all of Flagstaff has forgotten what it is like to drive in snow so they were going as slow as humanly possible. 6 miles in 30 minutes. I can understand not going the speed limit but this was excessive.

    Other odd thing, 90% of the cars had headlights on with the exception of white vehicles which 80% had their lights off because they stand out in the snow so well. Very, very odd.

    At least safe at work I guess.

  6. Just the cold ones TEB.

    Yah Jack, consider any of my postings fair game for molestation. I’ve always took that as good natured fun.

    wOOt! Two beans there are two beans.

  7. Just heard the unshow and by Mr. Mangan’s leave I will request this:

    Jack, please please molest me.

    I need you to molest me and anything that comes from me.

    MOLEST ME!!!!!

  8. Hehe lol, great minds think alike.

    I apologize Rhettro but the need was urgent. I will create a wormhole, go back in time and your comment will be ahead of mine 🙂

    So let it be written so let it be nipples.

  9. I finally gave up on finding my copy of Photoshop Elements to reinstall. So, I bought the new version. I’m in the process of unloading and tagging the last three week’s worth of pictures that have been gathering on my camera since my computer crash. I can’t say I see a lot of functional difference between Elements 5 and 6 so far, but I’ve only started digging into it.

  10. Jack – Re: The unpan
    You have my permission to bend, fold, spindle and mutilate anything I submit.
    In my frightening little world, when you have your way with my nocturnal submissions (ew, I had to go there) I look at it as having just collaborated with you on a project.

    sshhhhhhh! You’re not supposed to wake up people when they are sleep podcasting.

  11. No, not really joking. I’ve been having a very shitty week, culminated in a very shitty night where I threw some things around and left the house, went to Barnes and Noble and read Divorce for Dummies, then realized I had the exact combination of drugs that killed Heath Ledger, so I went home and took them. I was mid chew into some bacon wrapped shrimp and the next thing I know 10 EMTs are standing around me telling me I was alive but completely unresponsive for three hours. I guess I got slapped and jabbed in the eyes a few times and had no reaction. I guess all I can say to that is, hey, deadpan is the way.

    I just don’t really have a support network around here anymore, so when things get bad they tend to slip around like on newly formed ice.

    On the upside, my buddy Steve came through and my wife got that job. It pays less than her unemployment, but as I’ve heard and told her, its easier to find a job when you have one.

  12. Dub,

    In all seriousness, get some help. Everyone has seriously shitty weeks, but taking a handful of pills is a sign of major depression. Frankly, I’m shocked that the EMTs would let you alone after an episode like that. Find a local support group ASAP.

  13. They asked me if I was trying to commit suicide and I said no. I have perscriptions for all these drugs. There was no hard proof for them that I was suicidal.

    I do have a therapist. I just don’t have anyone I can talk to.

  14. Call your therapist and tell him/her what happened, get a referral to a support group. This isn’t the kind of thing to brush off. We’ve got a good group of people here at Deadpan to listen to you Dub and we can offer you our best advice, but an internet group is a poor subsitute for professional help and an in person gathering that you’d receive as part of a real support group.

  15. Dub, count me among the concerned. I agree with Rhett; I’m surprised the EMTs let it drop, proof or no.
    I don’t want to go all after-school special on you, but there are always other options. And I guarantee that most of the people on this board, myself included, can be available to talk when you need someone. A phone call is better than some irreversible action.

  16. Count me in as a concerned Deadpan friend, too. I agree with what everyone else said. Having a therapist is a great start, and s/he can help you find people in the area who can be a new support network for you. Please, take care of yourself. The Deadpan community cares about you.

  17. Dub, we do care about you, a lot. Trust me, that isn’t the way to solve anything. You do need to talk to your therapist, but I agree with Jack, that if you need to talk to anyone, we are all willing to help.

  18. I appreciate the support guys. It wasn’t a good night, and it wasn’t like an outright attempt… I’m under a lot of different medications, many similar to what Heath took, and the antibiotic I’m on now specifically said not to take with tinazidine, which I take for my back… And my back has been killing me, so I just kind of doubled up on everything. And yeah, I’ve got a lot attacking me emotionally right now… This was just such a passive attempt that the whole thing caught me by surprise. It’s like mid chew one minute I’m fine and the next the room is full of people I don’t know and I’ve got an oxygen tube up my nose.

    And apparently a lot of other things happened after that because today my wife and her friend can’t stop laughing about the dry blow job, and I know what she’s talking about but I don’t remember bringing it up. Thats just weird. An overall weird feeling.

    In fact I’m taking the day off. I feel like playing Zelda, but I beat it all ready. I’m tempted to get Ocarina of Time.

  19. Enjoy the day off to do nothing and to feel no pressure, Dub. Some relaxation/chill time would probably do you wonders.
    And pay attention to all of these offers; you have a bunch of ears out here.

    OK, I’ll stop harping on this — but feel free to vent ALL you want. Here, in e-mail, Skype, on the phone, etc.

  20. Well Ocarina is a long game Dub, not sure how well it works on the Wii’s virtual console though..I’ve still got the N64 cart somewhere.

  21. Sorry. I was gonna play Zelda… but opted for a nap. Which my wife woke me from for a bottle of Lime Rickey.

    Phone numbers would be interesting but I’m incredibly shy in person.

    Also I should mention my wife monitors my gmail account so if you want to send something just to me send it to michaelwright@taylorengr.com.

  22. Just a quick flash in the Pan…

    Look up the movie Sacred Sin and then tell me when Eddie Van Halen decided to get into the porn business.

    Ok, now back to my game

    (BTW – add my voice of concern to all others, Dub)

  23. Popping in to also show concern. Things are continued hectic around the Boze ranch, and more layoffs at work just add to the fun.

    But hang in there, Dub, the community all cares for real, we want you to be okay…

  24. New Rule:

    Read a couple of previous comments before submitting your own about your fun vacation and photos in case someone put something important up.

    I feel a bit like an ass, but I hadn’t read any comments (obviously) I was quite exhausted when I put that. anywho…

    Dub, 1-800-SUICIDE


    any attempt on your own life no matter how passive you may think it was is a cry for help, to post about it afterwards on a public online forum is an absolute scream for help. No one here (I assume) is a close neighbor and truly can do nothing for you but listen. The advice Rhettro gave you is advice you should seriously take action on. You need a support system that can be there when you need them. Personally, I know I can’t help you. I am 100% unqualified to help you, and my own life requires my full attention right now. Therefore, I urge you to follow Rhetts advice. Seek out a close by professional support group, or call that number.

    Hope everyone else is ok. We are doing good, and about to check out more NY night life. Take care peeps.

  25. ok, found that google reader is a good way to read. Looking for a better way to post. Hey jack, maybe we can flip it so most recent posts first.

  26. Cool for Cats – Squeeze

    The Indians send signals
    From the rocks above the pass
    The cowboys take positions
    In the bushes and the grass
    The squaw is with the Corporal
    She is tied against the tree
    She doesn’t mind the language
    It’s the beating she don’t need
    She lets loose all the horses
    When the Corporal is asleep
    And he wakes to find the fire’s dead
    And arrows in his hats
    And Davy Crockett rides around
    And says it’s cool for cats
    It’s cool for cats – Cool for cats

    The Sweeney’s doing ninety
    ‘Cause they’ve got the word to go
    They get a gang of villains
    In a shed up at Heathrow
    They’re counting out the fivers
    When the hand cuffs lock again
    In and out of Wandsworth
    With the numbers on their names
    It’s funny how their missus
    Always look the bleeding same
    And meanwhile at the station
    There’s a couple of likely lads
    Who swear like how’s your father
    And they’re very cool for cats
    They’re cool for cats – Cool for cats

    To change the mood a little
    I’ve been posing down the pub
    On seeing my reflection
    I’m looking slightly rough
    I fancy this, I fancy that
    I wanna be so flash
    I give a little muscle
    And I spend a little cash
    But all I get is bitter and a nasty little rash
    And by the time I’m sober
    I’ve forgotten what I’ve had
    And ev’rybody tells me that
    It’s cool to be a cat
    Cool for cats – Cool for cats

    Shake up at the disco
    And I think I’ve got a pull
    I ask her lots of questions
    As she hangs on to the wall
    I kiss her for the first time
    And then I take her home
    I’m invited in for coffee
    And I give the dog a bone
    She likes to go to discos
    But she’s never on her own
    I said I’ll see you later
    And I give her some old chat
    But it’s not like that on the TV
    When it’s cool for cats
    It’s cool for cats – Cool for cats

  27. Yea for Jeremy! I think they have finally worked the problems out of the newer models.

    I just had my Macbook back in last week to have the screen flicker fixed again ( first time they replaced the whole screen – this time they replaced the power inverter.) and to replace the super drive which had stopped burning DVDs.
    Got it back last Tuesday.
    The new superdrive failed last night. 🙁

    My Macbook will be 1 year old in a week.

    They have been doing all this work without charge or question though. So I guess that is a silver lining.

  28. The 50th Running of the Daytona 500 gets the green flag in about 2 minutes!

    If you go to NASCAR.com you can choose a few differrent ways to follow along.
    You can listen to in car audio or follow the telemetry.

  29. To all those who emailed me and I haven’t yet had a chance to respond.. Thank you. It is much appreciated.

    Upon further reflection, I realize just what a silly turn of events that night had been… It had started off with a money fight, me leaving to cool off for a while, but just ended up winding myself up more… And it wasn’t like I came home and had this clandestine plan to kill myself… I just took my normal medication… and my back had been hurting all day, so I took the muscle relaxers I’d been prescribed… And the antibiotic for my virus which said rather unobtrusively in the documentation not to take with my muscle relaxer… And so in my head it was like “Ok, either this is really gonna hurt or at worst it kills me, which at this point who cares.” And understand at that point my brain wasn’t exactly functioning on the normal plane of existance. So I kinda just took two of everything, which I’ve done before and not really had issue, but the wildcard was the antibiotic… And then I sat down to eat… And halfway through a mouthfull of food I passed out. I wasn’t dead or anything, though they said my oxygen level was way low and sugar level was way high (I was late for work that morning and forgot to grab a bannana, I was surviving the day on ginger ale and Dove carmel chocolates) I was just passed out with a load of food in my mouth. The EMTs were concerned because they had to jab me in the eyes six or seven times before I woke up. Which I don’t even remember that. Don’t remember much of anything after that, though apparently my re-enactment of the dry blowjob sketch was quite amusing.

    But I just wanted to reassure everyone.. I’m fine, I am going to see my therapist this week, I’m talking to the few limited human beings I know around here and I’m playing the old Zelda just to try and relax. My back is killing me because the muscle relaxers are hidden… But other than that I’m all right.

  30. Call me cynical, but if US politicians are anything like the ones in the UK, they promise a lot of things when they want to be elected, promises that are usually forgotten if they get elected.

  31. Dumb things to say No.1564:

    On seeing a friend’s Dad (the guy is in his 80’s and has survived several strokes and heart attacks), “So you are still alive then?”


  32. ” A professional politician, is who when bought, stays bought.”- R.A. Heinlein

    I probably misquoted that, but it’s fairly accurate.

  33. Well yes, Dub.

    You do the right thing, even if no one else will. Even if everyone else is gleefully doing wrong, even if they’re all prospering for their unethical choices. You do the right thing.

    I think Obama has no chance. Same for Hillary. The Roscoe P. Coltrane rule will decide the outcome of the next election. I’d love to eat those words, but – – we’ll see. That also doesn’t mean you shouldn’t vote for the person who you feel best represents you and your ideals — regardless of the Roscoe Rule.

  34. I have to disagree with you Mr. Mangan. I look at it not as the Roscoe rule. But as the barbecued pig rule. I think the politician that looks the most natural standing next to large roasting pig on a spit over an open fire wins. And quite frankly I think Barak Obama looks a lot more comfortable next to a giant roasting pig while banjo music plays then McCain ever would.

  35. The Roscoe P. Coltrane – This may be the election where that law get’s streeeetched quite a bit.
    Every time I try and picture Roscoe shaking hands with McCain … Roscoe ends up with his head cocked slightly to one side and his mouth open with no sound coming out … like when you’ve just given a dog an instruction (“Go get the ball! Go on!) and it wants desperately to make you happy but has no idea what it is you are saying.

    I think Huckabee was the last Roscoe candidate standing … and with luck we will have him out of the way soon.

  36. I think Hillary is the Roscoe candidate. But wait… How far back does that go? Would Kennedy be considered a Roscoe candidate?

    But I admit. This election has me nervous.

    But then so did the last two, so what’s the fucking difference. lol

  37. After a full day of wiring, panicking, slicing, testing, and panicking some more….

    I am now radio free in my car. I had been toying for months with getting a new head unit either with built in iPod control, or at least an AUX in jack.

    As I looked, the iPod control on most radios looks whacked unless you layout a lot of money. As for the AUX in, I realized, all I really wanted was something to give me a better connection than a cassette adapter (yeesh).

    So, instead of spending $150 on a head unit with a mediocre amp, I put the $150 into a dedicated amplifier and now just have my iPod hooked up to it.

    And, it sounds magnificent!

  38. !
    I expected to be amused and instead was impressed.
    Nicely grown sir!

    Now … we want pictures and schematics of the “X-42 space modulator” that you just installed in you car. 🙂

  39. I’ve seen those before Van, problem is that pressurizing them takes more energy than charging a battery. Of course, beyond the energy use they’d be more environmentally friendly than having lots of car batteries.

    What we need is a near limitless energy supply that doesn’t create any harmful emmisions.

    This is my candidate for solving that:

    If we had lots of power plants like this, our cars could use whatever. We could charge electric cars or use electrolysis to create hydrogen.

  40. G’day Pan.

    Rhettro – The downside I had heard about the Geothermal (it’s always something) is that when the water comes back up as steam, it is permeated with heavy metals … and not the “One way ticket to midnight” variety.

    This was the complaint about them in Hawaii where they seemed at first to beth answer. Then, over time everything downwind started dieing. In one case it was a dairy farm. While the cows hadn’t died, the pasture they had been grazing in did. Then everyone wondered how contaminated the milk had become. The energy company and the government quickly bought all the cattle and made some restitution to the farmer and IF the cows and there milk were ever tested for heavy metal poisoning – those results were never released.

    Oh, and as the Wiki article mentioned – they may cause earthquakes.

    It’s just ALWAYS something isn’t it?

  41. JJ, there’s no such thing as a free lunch. LOL. Name the the energy tech and there is a down side one cannot ignore. That being said, I think that the geothermal shows the best promise in terms of not using vast quantities of resourses and taping into the near limitless energy potential of earth’s hot core.

  42. Jack is feeling powerless.

    Rhet – I do think Geothermal could be a good source of power.
    As far as the “deadly emmission” part of it … that is easily dealt with through modern technology. Building a facility similur to those they build around the equipment that is use d to “de-commision” chemical warheads and shells.

    All it would require would be an energy company that was willing to spend the money needed to build and operate the facility in the safest manor currently technically possible … and then NOT be looking for new ways to cut corners every quarter in order to squeeze a few more pennies worth of profit out of the facility for benefit of their stock holders.
    Oh yeh, now I remember why this won’t work. 🙁

  43. ” … and then NOT be looking for new ways to cut corners every quarter in order to squeeze a few more pennies worth of profit out of the facility for benefit of their stock holders.”

    True, true from nuclear power plants to lollipop plants, the issues remain the same. LOL

  44. Reminded of the lead codpiece that Deckard wears in ‘Do Androids..’

    Can’t see much or future for nuclear power unless they crack fusion or develop better fast breeder reactors…Uranium reserves would be used up quickly.

  45. Just another work day here in Texas as well, though traffic was a bit lighter.

    The only sign of presidents are commercials from the bozos left and right now burdening my airwaves.

    At least I don’t have to worry about them in the car anymore 🙂

  46. It’s pretty cool to go “off the grid” in the car isn’t Ed? Which is one of the reasons I don’t really care for satellite radio, why pay for someone else’s music stream when you can download stuff ala carte from the internet?

  47. *GreasyJellyBeanReminder*GreasyJellyBeanReminder*GreasyJellyBeanRemi

    You had bozos in your car, Ed? Clearly, you need an aromatic tree to hang from your mirror.
    Yes, I envy you guys with your fancy cap mp3-players. My options are:
    terrestrial radio
    or crappy-sounding iPod FM tuner

  48. Reading that Wiki article on “free energy” and the theortists that are trying to figure out a way to release it …
    I am reminded of those wacky guys who theorized that if they could simple release the energy that was being used to hold electrons around the nucleus of an atom … they would have an unlimited amount of power! Because even though atoms are small … there are zillions of them all around us.

    So they took just a few pounds of uranium and figured out how to split the electrons away from the atoms in that stuff and when they did so, sure enough those microscopic particles gave off their energy. A LOT of energy.
    BOOOM, the atomic bomb.

    Some where down the road they will undoubtably discover, within a few moments time, that Zero-point energy makes a fantastic desert topping … AND a dandy hole in the space/time continuem.

    I can’t wait to see the “NOVA” episode. 🙂

  49. Leann – I suspect that in the heat of battle, Sherman (who was standing a liiiiiittle too close to the cannon fire) had a sudden, futuristic vision of trying to make the commute between Dalton and Downtown Atlanta. The result was his his single minded determination to burn that puppy to the ground.

  50. Alas, I fear only time will clear up the bozo infection that has come to Texas. The Republicans appear to be promising more of the same, and the Democrats are simply promising everything. Neither option looks particularly thrifty.

  51. Did anyone see that episode of Dexter’s Lab, where he gets bitten by a clown and gets infected with clown virus? Pretty close to the feelings I have about clowns. Other than “Killer Klowns from Outer Space.”

  52. Oh, man, Pan…

    There was this really interesting Coast to Coast this weekend. Its about the Men in the US and how they are less and less manly. Not like homosexual, but less driven and…well…manly…

    Here is the book they were talking about: http://tinyurl.com/3yex63

    If y’all want to listen to it, let me know, I’ll upload it and email the link.

  53. Coast to Coast was a staple of work when I was Night Auditor, in fact the first Night Audit job I had the guy training me almost used it as part of the training program. Some nights informative, others down right weird, but never ever boring. But some of those guests you honestly have to wonder what drugs they are on.

  54. Leann, I think you’re mistaking symbols for actions. Personally I could walk into just about any restaurant down South and not get harassed too much. In fact actually most racial tensions are highest in cities. This is all based on my interactions. Not based on any statistical information. Just purely based on my anecdotal observations.

    While most people have the popular opinion that racists are people that carry Confederate flags and where a hoods as they dance around a burning cross. Personally I find the biggest and worst racist is the person that holds low expectations of another person. Especially people that judge others purely based on their accents or their chosen professions.

    I am all for helping out the disenfranchised and for evening the playing field. Unfortunately our society has adopted an attitude of excuses. These excuses that led to a form of entitlement ans sadly resentment on all sides. The Liberal racism of low expectations is a dirty subject. One that most people don’t want to acknowledge but explains why we have many of the problems we do. I think that all people should be held to the same standards and that all people should have the same opportunities. Truth is I’m neither liberal nor conservative. I find both parties repugnant.

    The Liberals want to censor anything that might offend a minority.

    The Conservatives want to censor any that isn’t promoting their religious groups or attacks their corporate agenda.

    I think the big reason why people down South still cling to their “heritage” and waved that Confederate flag is because every time they turn the TV there made fun of by Larry the Cable Guy. Just because you have a Southern accent or you like NASCAR does not mean you’re a moron. Some of the things I hear people say amaze me. People think that the second you leave the safety of the suburbs you’ll be tied to a tree and raped like Ned Beatty. Unfortunately, popular media doesn’t like to reflect the ugly truth.

    These things are true:

    1. Most black people are killed by black people.

    2. There are more blacks in prison than in college.

    The ugly truth is that corporations found out a long time ago that they could make more money selling Air Jordans and “50 Cent” albums to white kids then they can inspiring the black youth of America.

    I’m hoping that Obama will change our attitudes and expectations of both Whites and Blacks. Someday hopefully we can get rid of that ugly confederate flag on the rooftop of the Capitol building in Atlanta because that little piece of cloth is the real problem in our country.

    Now the you’re probably forming at the mouth let me just say that I don’t believe Atlanta is any more racist than Cleveland, Detroit, Philadelphia, or New York. Atlanta is just a whole lot prettier than those cities and the waitresses are a lot nicer regardless of their color.

    Yes we can!!! Obama in 2008!

  55. Psyching up to do major revision and expansion on the original “Really Big Things” to prepare for re-recording and Podiobook release.

    Rest assured, you will be the first to know.

  56. Considering the amount of violent crime perpetrated by men, maybe a world with less manly men is the way to go.

    Of course it could end up like that Richard Cowper novel (OBSCURE SCIFI AUTHOR ALERT!!!!) where women switch roles as the men become less manly.

  57. hi pan

    we’re back from NY.
    we drank, we saw, we ate. NY will never be the same

    Hugh sez: that hotel room will never be the same

    🙂 lol, no it won’t.

    methinks a world with less manly men would suck. and I mean suck in a bad way

    Hugh sez: my baby loves her manly men

    🙂 I do. Manly and a gentlemen.. nothing is manlier than a real gentleman. Confident and assured of himself, treat a lady like a lady. Thats what I think of when I think manly… a confident gentleman.

    Hugh sez: than what are you doing with me

    oh please, whatevar Hugh 🙂

    Hugh sez: 🙂

    Well we need to go to bed, back to work tomorrow 🙁

    Stock market awaits Hugh, and I have an FTP folder full of photos to be retouched 🙁


  58. wait I have a political question/comment before I go…

    I vote exclusively liberal… for me the things I care about are supported by all democratic candidates. There are certain social issues that to me are what I vote on. So when I say I vote for Hilary, I just choose her as the democratic candidate, I feel as a woman I want to support the woman candidate. Its important to me as a woman who makes 75 cents to a mans dollar, that a woman achieves the highest position in our society. That is an issue that is important to me.
    But when I say I support Hilary, I by no means hate Obama. I love Obama, and if Obama wins the democratic nomination I will for sure be voting for him. So I don’t understand the hatred for Hilary among democratic voters…. is everyone else really voting for the person they like over the issues?

    This confuses me… Because for me… I want a strong democratic candidate to win over the republican candidate to assure that the social issues that matter to me are upheld.. but the more I talk to people the more I think I am the only 1 who thinks this way

    Like I believe you can interchange McCain for Clinton for Huchabee for Obama for whomever in reality.. no candidate is too far from the middle. Its not liek HEad of State where there is 1 candidate speaking entirely everything I believe in.. but I have to step back and decide what matters to me, and what matters to me is that these social issues continue to be inportant.. Clinton by no means is a perfect candidate, neither is Obama, neither truly says 100% what I feel on everything. But I am a woman, and I am sick of women being pushed aside and we deserve our chance at running this country, that is whats important to me. I don’t think Clinton is “better” than Obama, I don’t think Obama is evil. I love Obama, I’m in Illinois for Gods sake.. Obama is the bomb, yo. I used to see him at the grocery store every week and he would talk to my mom 🙂

    ok thats it… if anyone cares to comment please do, if you care to not, then don’t 🙂
    Deadpan is a democracy after all 😉

    Hugh sez: who left th soapbox out again??? Didn’t I tell you people???



    going to bed now
    night pan

  59. Issues, most certainly. But, and I’m sure we’ll hear it again this campaign cycle as we do with every other, character matters as well. A candidate can say anything, but can you trust him/her to follow through. For that matter, is what their promising even possible?

    So far, I’m not seeing any choices that fit. Love or Hate doesn’t really enter the equation.

    And, to be clear, character is different from personality. A candidate can come across with a likeable personality, but still be of questionable character.

  60. I also have to question somewhat the $.75 vs. $1.00 assertion. It may be the case that if you take all the men and all the women in the country, you may come up with such a ratio. However, in my experience, for doing the same work in the same environment, women make as much or more as their male counterparts. When I graduated engineering school, the women in my class were getting the highest offers. Make no mistake, they were all deserving and I begrudged them nothing for it – I certainly got a good enough offer myself.

    The problem I see tends to be that women are more likely to enter a field, like teaching, that “society” views as worth less in terms of salary. I do think theres a case to be made that we’ve got problems when we pay some thug who can throw/hit/dunk a ball millions of dollars to be an ass an generally bad role model for our kids, yet for our teachers, police, and military – not so much.

    Alright, this has gotten way to heavy for breakfast. Quick, send in the clowns!

  61. Managed to get sneak preview passes so the hubby and I are going to see Vantage Point tonight. Looks like it could be a good movie.

  62. Good Morning All.

    The Smarty Hotties® – Woot for your NY trip !!!!

    Re: Hillary – I don’t “hate” her. I dislike her as a candidate for the same reason I dislike McCain. Their track records these past few years indicates to me that they will say anything so I don’t know how I could possible “judge them on the issues.”

    Frankly … I see these two as the exact same candidate with the only real differrence being in which special interest and corporations they will owe their election to.

    That being said, if it came down to an election between the two I would choose Hilary.

    Reguardless of what the far right claims, both parties spend our tax dollars at the same rate. So, if given the choice between billions being given to Haliburton, Blackwater, and Exxon/Mobil vs. billions going to Humana, Alternative energy companies and Public Broadcasting … I’ll take the later.

    If nothing else, the heathcare companies are still headquartered in the US so they pay more back to us in taxes AND they are accountable to our Government.
    Haliburton is getting millions of dollars a day from the US government and to say “thanks” they recently moved their corporate headquarters to Dubi (sp) where the US now has NO authority to make them show ANY of their records on how they are spending that money.

    Yeh, we’ve had eight years of giving our tax dollars to that sort of corporation … if that is the way it ha to be then I’m ready to give a completely different set of corporations a try.

  63. Say … does anyone have the desire/skilz to start a “Deadpan Backroom” or “Deadpan Soapbox” blog?

    Somewhere Deadpan members could go and post our long, “heavy” thoughts. We can still talk about anything here but in the instance of soapbox posts like mine above … I could have just said “I have some thoughts on this and they are here ..” and then post a link.

    Then those that are interested could click on over. That would also allow Jack to avoid having to read any of these in the GJB comments.

    I’m just thinking that with the approach of the US election … the need to express these thoughts may be on the increase. Do we want to leave them here or do we want to create a room for them?

    Any thoughts?

  64. In the news:

    New research shows that first born children get about 3,000 more hours of quality time with parents between ages 4 and 13 than the next sibling gets when they pass through the same age range. The study provides a possible explanation for why older children tend to get more education, make more money and score higher on IQ tests. The researchers used data from the American Time Use Survey, a federal government study involving 21,000 people.

    – What about only children like me and my hubby?

  65. Penguins beware…

    It has been 40 million years since the waters around Antarctica have been warm enough to sustain populations of sharks and most fish, but they may return this century due to the effects of global warming. If they do, the effect on Antarctic ecology cold b e serious, according to researchers from the University of Rhode Island. URI biology professors analyzed the physiological adaption and metabolism of sharks and other warm-water predators and concluded an increase of just a few degrees Celsius could make Antarctic waters hospitable to some species.

    – Calgary Sun

  66. Oh dear lord all kinds of conversation that I managed to miss.

    #1: Jack/Trucker: Please don’t ever rant like that and end it with “Go Obama.” While you’re right in some degree, Leann left Atlanta for a VERY good reason which you probably haven’t figured out yet, so I would really just drop the topic. Trust me on this one buddy. Just trust me. And what I get out of his platform is a sense of civic and personal responsibility, so the “get over it” response (which you probably didn’t make, its very early and I need to be to work soon and will still be asleep) doesn’t really fly.

    #2 Andrea: I hate Hilary Clinton because she has more scandal attached to her name than her husband and Nixon combined. She says she’s been tested, it’s because Republicans have plenty to sling at her. They WANT her as the Dem candidate. Because McCain is attacking Obama the same way Clinton is. And Clinton’s loosing. If that continues through the General Election, Obama’s practically all ready won. If he can just knock her out in Texas and Ohio that is. Then this thing is pracitically over. Unless she wins, in which case the nomination will be deadlocked till the election, and by then the GOP will have had enough time to swing enough independents there way that it won’t matter WHICH candidate is chosen. The Dems will lose to pure apathy and impatience.

    I can’t say anything else, I have to shower and go to work… *sigh*

  67. On Hillary: I quite like Hillary, and if she gets the nomination I will most certainly vote for her. It is just that my views are more in line with Obama, so he gets my support for now. My wife is a registered democrat and she voted for Hillary in the primary. I lean pretty liberal on social issues and conservative on financial issues and I don’t like the all or nothing attitudes of either party. Democrats historically want to solve all the nations ills with some inefficient government financed program. Republicans think that cutting taxes solves everything. I don’t buy into either of those philosophies. My take is that any large group of people can be corrupt, be that corporations, unions, organized religions or government. So just being different shouldn’t earn any of those groups special protection and I feel like whatever party I vote for leads to corruption in the groups that individual party favors.

  68. Dear Mr. Trucker:

    Thank you for your diatribe.

    All I need to say to you is, duly noted, and spoken like a guy from Cleveland.

    I would like to let you know I was born in nowhere Tennessee, raised in Alabama, and lived in Georgia for about 5 years.

    It doesn’t get much more Southern than that right there.

    So I speak confidently when I say, I know more about the South and its heritage than you ever will (not that I am proud of that sad fact)

    Please don’t try to go toe to toe with me on this one, seriously.


  69. I suppose the problem with manly men, is that llike a lot of things in life you get a lot of bad with all the macho crap.

    So for every gentleman there are 9 who would use mental/physical violence in a relationship.

  70. From a New Scientist editorial:

    da Dickie, a forensic psychologist at Spalding University in Louisville, Kentucky, conducted a survey of men seeking casual work in Ottawa, Canada. Her as yet unpublished research shows that 42 per cent admitted either to having raped an adult, or having had sex with a minor at least five years younger than themselves. Raymond Knight, a psychologist at Brandeis University in Waltham, Massachusetts, obtained similarly disturbing results while conducting research into the roots of abuse against women (Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences, vol 989, p 72). In a sample of blue-collar American men, 36 per cent admitted to having done at least one of the following: using or threatening force in an attempt to obtain sex from a woman; having or attempting to have sex with a woman who was too drunk or high to say no; or plying a woman with drink or drugs to that end. Such behaviour is not the preserve of working-class men: some studies suggest that about 15 per cent of women attending US colleges fall victim to rape or attempted rape, committed by privileged young me.

    I remember reading that and finding it all rather depressing.

  71. It is depressing Van, it’s more depressing when you find out that something like 1 in 5 or so women have been sexually abused. That’s unexceptable.

  72. I think that “Manly Men” is the wrong term. More like, emasculation (wow, spelt it right on the first try) of men.

    Look at advertising for example. Men are nearly always dumb-asses in commercials. Its rather irritating.

    RE: Politics….Look how Obama does in traditionally red states. He kills it! Now those are going to be the ones we want the most voter turn out. If Hillary is the nominee then she won’t draw those folks as well as Obama will and while I am sure we’d still win the popular vote, we all know that does not guarantee anything. We need a decisive victory to squash any shenanagans.

  73. Van: And those aren’t “Manly Men” (see Andrea’s post for a good description) they are sexually repressed and not able to grow up in a socially natural environment. When you homogenize the upbringing and don’t take into account the difference in genders you get f’ed up adults.

    …at least In My Opinion.

  74. morning pan 🙂 rolling into “work” at almost 11am.. for shame! Hey, I had to unpack from NY and do our laundry. Try on the bounty I purchased whilst in NY. I love shopping in NY.

    good comments people- I think my point was more that I dont understand how anyone can see Clinton or Obama as the enemy when McCain or whatever republican is the enemy in my mind.. no offense to the Deadpan republicans 🙂
    As a democrat, I look at Obama and Clinton and think we are all democrats, I find this whole race fascinating, like Obamas speech when he spoke so eloquently about the history being made with this race of the 1st viable black and female candidates. I think it is so cool. BUT if some chance Clinton makes it, all the Clinton haters, are they going to vote for McCain? Is your hatred of Hilary so strong that you cannot see past the person and look at the core issues of the party they represent? That was my question- cause that boggles my mind. I am voting for Clinton or Obama in the general election, no matter which one makes it, and I am not upset either way. I chose Clinton in the primary for my own personal feelings as a woman, but not because I thought Clinton was better than Obama. I really had to just step back and say to myself, you are a woman, you are a feminist, this is a female candidate who COULD make it, how can I not vote for that? Being the feminist I am?

    I’m not getting into the woman issue, about making more money or whatever, that is too sensitive a topic for me. i feel very strongly on it and I don’t want to bring that here 🙂

    so, I agree with j0e.. maybe we should have a “deep thoughts” area 🙂

    so no more deep thoughts from me…..

  75. Speaking of NY:

    Todays Reason to Drink:
    February 20, 2008
    The Metropolitan Museum of Art first opened today. If you’re not in the USA, then celebrate with some absinthe, which influenced artists such as Degas, Manet, van Gogh, and Picasso.

  76. ok crap 1 more thought I forgot to put in that:

    I see myself as a democrat first, a feminist 2nd. When I considered the primary, i knew I would vote democrat, my feminism drove my selection of Clinton.
    So I am a democrat first,and will always be a democrat first, and that is more important to me than arguing Obama’s or Clintons merits or records or anything.

  77. “When you homogenize the upbringing and don’t take into account the difference in genders you get f’ed up adults.”

    I couldn’t agree more Jeremy. I feel like I could write a thesis about this, but I’ll spare the Dead Pan for now. I might as well throw this inflammatory thought I had while reading through today’s post.

    “I feel the vast majority of men would be serial rapists if they didn’t have a conscience and empathy for their fellow humans and it is up to parents and society at large to instill these values and champion these values.”

    Wow! Seems like this week’s comment board has taken a mighty heavy turn. Jack might have to cherry pick the funny ones.

  78. I don’t consider myself a loyalist democrat, I think both parties have a lot to answer for and if anything is going to happen in this country thats good it has to be a result of people coming together. But I guess I could be a fucktard.

    I almost wish I’d have started this thing wishing for Ron Paul. Because I could have given up by now, not having my hopes all up and shit. *lol*

    Honestly I see the next one, Ohio goes to Obama and Texas to Hilary in such a slim margin that it almost doesn’t matter. And then it goes deadlocked straight to the convention. Which isn’t great, but so be it.

    As for the other conversation, my wife is five years younger than me. And I’m not so sure how I feel about her repeatedly asking for me to “insert another one.” Makes me wish *I* was a black guy.

  79. I have no problem with the heavy stuff appearing on this page.
    The podcast and the comments have always been about diversity of content and themes, serious and silly side-by-side.

    And fuck, it’s election year. . . . this shit is going to be on all of our minds. It’s perfectly acceptable to have serious sociological discussions alongside pictures of a giant, inflatable dog’s ass.

  80. Dear Dubshack,

    You don’t have to worry about Hillary winning the nomination. In order to come close she would have to beet Obama by over 65% in Texas. That simply isn’t going to happen. The sad part is as soon as this portion of the elections over the momentum and energy may leave the race. I know you’ll save on ani-acids but this kind of serious discussion of politics involving multiple points of view is seriously absent from our nation.

    Dear Rhetto,

    The biggest turnoff for me about Hillary Clinton is her sense of entitlement. All throughout the election process I got the feeling that she was bored and just wanted to be president. I don’t believe in nepotism. I barely believe in incumbency. I got the feeling that she was going to do what she wanted regardless of campaign promises. It was exactly the feeling George W. Bush gave me.

    Some may argue that it’s wrong to base votes on feelings. Considering that most politicians just do what they want once they are elected, I put a lot of stock in my gut instinct about people.

    Dearly Leann,

    Personally, I would never want to go toe to toe with you over the South. I will say that the South, like much of America is a complete enigma once you scratch the surface. I was raised to believe one thing about people from certain locations. Those stereotypes were fortified by media, family, and even my public school education. When I actually hung out in those areas I start to find that down is up and up is down. You may very well be right. I simply can’t ignore what I’ve experienced firsthand. I would love to hear personal experiences. Perhaps there might be a pod cast where you can talk about personal experiences and interactions you’ve had. As well as may be discuss your life and philosophy. If only there were such a pod cast… 🙂

  81. Dear Trucker

    U use big wordz

    Actually by continuing to win even a 40% margin and not dropping out, she forces this thing to go to the convention, where the Super Delegates will decide who wins. Because its not possible for either of them to get the 2000+ delegates needed to win the nomination from state contests. And once you get to the convention, things can become tricky. I mean I trust the guys we sent as delegates are capable of making a good case, and our governor (who is female) backs Obama but all the mayors are on Hillary’s side. Also I heard today there is some process where she can “poach” delegates from Obama, but if she were to do that it would have seriously negative implications for the Democratic party.

    As some have said, at this point she can’t win, she can only make Obama loose. And considering the only argument McCain can bring against Obama is the same she’s making, and she’s loosing for it, that would be a damn shame. For once in our lifetime I think we’ve found a guy that would be worth having as President. (I liked Reagan, but that was ages ago)

    As for taking this to the Farpoint Forums… Take it from a guy who just spent four days arguing with the mods over whether or not to allow religious or political discussion to take place there. Trust me, it isn’t happening. At least for now, until poor Scott can find a job and we can all hammer out a system where people are clear on their personal responsibilities and theres a platform for the mods to work with. Which we’re still in the process of doing, but taking our time for Scott. I did mention though that the Deadpan comments board was a shining example of people being able to legitimately discuss and handle these topics, and they took that as a good point.

    As for Leann, I keep telling you guys, the only way we’re getting a new show is if we kill the dog. It’s the only way. Maybe even the cat.

  82. Oh yeah —– good luck trying to kill HER cat.

    Or, as Leann points out — those are some badass Shiznitzus. Trixie is like the Shitzu of the Baskervilles.

    Yeah, Sir A. Conan Doyler jokes are always funny.

    OK, I have a show to procrastinate.

  83. I told Jack to check his website, and he is still waiting for it to load.

    I said load.

    His computer NEEDS to retire.

    There is a lovely Mac mini sitting on my desk RIGHT NOW ready for him.

    I am going to convert him to the good side.

    This all brought to you by Leann on her Macbook Pro sitting on the back porch.

  84. OK, we are so starting a band:

    Hormonal Driven Outbursts

    Our fans will call us HDO.

    OK….. Really, she’s a supersweet woman. In spite of the HDOs.

    (yes, my ancient PC is a piece of shit. I could record and edit Deadpan faster on an abacus.)

  85. boobs

    ok its official, I’m sorry i brought up the question..

    On that note I would like to say… I would vote for any candidate who admits they own a sleep sac or a vac bed from any party. Cause that would kick ass.

    Hugh sez: or the candidate that admits he loves CBT


    you know Bill Clinton does

    Hugh sez: oh yeah he does, and he has a sleep sac

    Hilary is taotlly a pro-domme 🙂

    Leann- I thought I heard that even if you get fixed, you still get PMS and shit. Of course I didn’t hear this from an actual doctor so I am basically talking out of my ass

  86. Yeah for Lasik…actually, I think we have discussed it, but I could be remembering a conversation from somewhere else….

    Anyway – my wife had it done about five years ago and it’s changed her life. She was always having to deal with contacts and a 20/200 vision. Now, she’s 20/15 and I don’t have to make midnight runs to Walgreens for saline solution or contact cases when we’re out of town.

  87. ASH: OMG, how much would I LOVE LOVE LOVE to go to a dayspa!?!?!?!



    The whole 9 fo rill.

    I sooo need it.

    The last time I treated myself to anything like that laser hair removal, and I don’t know if I would call THAT good times.

    The time before that was chiropractic/massage, and once again, that was for a totally fucked up spine, so not much pampering done there either.

    I am CLEARLY due.

  88. If you are looking for a sensibly priced massage check out your local therapy schools. They need people to practice on for everything.

  89. OHHH disgruntled scientist…..that may be a good idea….although I did go through 6 month of traction and shit for my fucked up spine, methinks I would need to pick a graduate….


    Dub babydoll, you and I have more in common than you think…..like I said, you need to talk to me.

  90. So today at work I was daydreaming about the first episode of Really Big Things with a mind toward revision and expansion. I was picturing the whole Spoonbridge With Cherry setting and thought to myself how nice it would be to go there and work on the chapter. I was actually far enough inside the setting that I was imagining it in late summer.

    I looked out the window and the 2ºF weather reality came crashing in…

  91. There was a little dialogue between two guys I was considering writing up and recording as a mini-skit for either Deadpan or FPR, but now I think it is going into RBT.

    Fear not though, I think I have one or two little bits of something I sent to Jack for the cast he is feverishly laboring over at present…

  92. Serious Comment Asplode.

    RE Lazik. I am considering it. It would be sweet….

    RE: 300: Kerry Sez: I drooled too!!!

    RE: Acne: So glad I havent’ had it since Jr. High/ High school, but I don’t have any advice for yous…

    RE: Flashing… ahem… share? No? Ok…cool..


  93. One banana
    one packet of buildup – banana flavour
    200ml of semi skimmed milk
    some whipped cream sprayed from a can

    Mix it all up in a blender

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