406 thoughts on “Jack Mangan’s Deadpan #117: Nice

  1. One has to wonder how long it will be before the game studios put out a hit on that guy. His merciless candor is always a sight to behold.

  2. Enjoying Amy’s audio play..and a Life, the Universe, and Everything reference..cool.

    I want to live in that world Jack talks about.

  3. Silversun Pickups will be coming out with a new album: Swoon. lmao. Are they lurkers here. Mark Forman got me listening to these guys, so I’ll definitely check out the new album. You gotta like a band that has a song called “Well Thought Out Twinkles”. 😉

  4. Of course, now I feel guilty. I’m taking off for a few hours. Braving the cold for some errands, then having lunch with a friend.

  5. Ooo! Oo! Oo! If we’re sweathogs, I want to be Horschack!

    ditto, did you notice that Asobi Seksu also has a new album scheduled to release next month? 2009 is off to a strong shoegazer start.

  6. Have a read of the PDF on the sight TEB. The goal is noble enough.

    When I taught Astronomy I had to advise students to be realistic about what they would they see through affordable telescopes, we’ve been spoilt by photos from BIG telescopes and space probes.

  7. Jack: *applauds* I agree wholeheartedly with the “rise of the nice people” speech you made in this episode. 🙂 (I was going to post the chorus from “We’re Not Gonna Take It,” but ditto beat me to it.)

    I’m excited about reading Watchmen, too.

  8. Well Deadpan.

    Nice and snowy with a blizzard warning right now. I think It’s a good time to curl up with a book and some hot chocolate

  9. Hi, JR! Thank you! 🙂

    Cj: I remember when I finished the Spherical Tomi Podiobook. It was my third Podiobook, after seasons 1 and 2 of “Duel of the Fates.” I don’t remember getting goosebumps, but I remember the impact of the ending. It’s a great story.

    J0e, Ed: LOL! Hmm… what if Spherical Tomi took place in Scott Sigler’s sci-fi universe? It’s interesting to contemplate.

  10. Hmm… no, or at least not for the same purpose as Perry did, but..

    *SPOILERS if you’re not caught up with the podcast of “Contagious”*







    she could probably go head-to-head with the Orbital and prevent it from reprogramming the newest batch of seeds. 😀

  11. I was at the Sigler reading and I know that I will never be able to read/listen to any of his stories that involve the horror aspect. I just can’t do it. I don’t do horror. I did love the reading, though I would never make it beyond that – it was difficult for me.

  12. I was trying to figure out what he was doing too, but I was too busy trying to get my camera to take a decent picture. Good camera when it works, bad camera with the settings are wonky.

  13. So in a strange bit of (almost related) news. My martial arts master scared me yesterday.

    Normally I would test for my next belt around April but I’m doing well so when I last spoke to him he suggested I might test in March.

    Yesterday he pulled me aside before the class. He asked when I last tested (Late November)
    He asked me if I’d be in on Saturday (which I usually am and will be)
    He waits a moment.
    Then he says, “I’ll let you know for sure on Saturday, but I think you’re doing well enough I might have you test in February instead.”
    Then he promptly teaches me four new self defense moves.

    That’s in two weeks!!!!


    (the moral is, you better be careful Wolf. I seem to be excelling in beating people up 🙂 )

  14. They are four different ways to break off is someone grabs you by the wrist with one hand. (last time I was taught two different moves to break the grip if they grab your wrist with two hands)

  15. All moves seem to end with what is called a “finishing move”. Usually this means after breaking away, there is then a hard elbow or fist to the head or a kick in the gut or genital area.

  16. There is one cool move though, when someone grabs your wrist with two hands, where you end up bending their arm behind their back and then pulling them back and kneeing them in the spine.

  17. All that being said, I seem to be best at throwing people to the ground. Everybody has their strong suit, and that seems to be mine. (The finishing move for these is twisting the persons arm to almost breaking and then slicing your fingers into their throat.)

  18. I find I listen to Deadpan in various ways, depending upon circumstances. I sometimes listen to on the computer, will plug my i-pod into external speakers, listen on ear buds, or in the car.

  19. *raises hand*

    I have to listen on earbuds because I am in the presence of children 99% of the time.

    Except for this weekend – where I get to escape motherhood for 3 nights in a row AND I get to hang out with Jack! *swoooon* (and my husband too 😉 )

  20. CJ makes a valid point about the need to listen in a “safe” mode.

    I prefer to listen via earbud when ever possible, as it just feels more intimate.
    Yes, that sounds odd … but I find that “post listening”, if I have listened through the earbuds I actually feel like I’ve just been hanging out with Jack and the gang. I don’t seem to have that same afterglow with speakers.

    Maybe I need to adjust my mmmedication.

  21. Generally, I’m listening on my commute to work as well. I download the MP3 file directly to my Sansa Clip or my Sony PSP then connect my portable device to my car stereo’s AUX jack and play through the car speakers. The 4runner has a cassette deck, so I use a cassette AUX adaptor when I’m driving it.

  22. Actually … I prefer to listen through piezoelectric pads screwed directly to my skull – while I’m strapped to an ergonomic, infinitely positionable chase lounge and women skilled in in the various erotic arts, non-verbally reveal their secrets to me all while Bill Gates transfers large sums of money from HIS bank account into secret off shore accounts he has set up for me.

    That’s how I would prefer to listen to the Deadpan.

  23. Jack the tease strikes again!

    Usually listen to DP through earbuds, but will occasionally listen through PC speakers by streaming the episode from the website.

  24. I have stolen a lot from MP, but – there are long stretches of the Flying Circus that just weren’t that funny. When they WERE funny, however. . . .

    btw, I should point out that I kinda stole elements of the joke about Obama’s presidency from a Justa J0e comment, from a few weeks back.

  25. Van: I won’t disagree, but comedy is really hard to write. It’s only natural that you get more failures than success. Still… even though there are plenty of MP skits that I don’t like, there are plenty of brilliant gems left.

  26. Well Pan, larder is filled, lunch is et, dishes are done. Now to relax a bit before getting ready for the masses to arrive 🙂

  27. So my movie choice for tomorrow is Milk, Frost/Nixon or Valkyrie.

    Leaning towards the latter even though it’s been slagged off in the reviews I’ve seen.

  28. Rhettro, are you stopping by the con? I’d love to meet you! Have I met you? (sheepish) I have a knack for meeting people and forgetting that I’ve done so.

  29. Mike, Summer, Brian, etc. are all heading over to the Con – with recording equipment – so I doubt if they’re hauling Wil Wheaton all the way back to the studio. But – you never know.

    A lot of sheep around here lately. . .

  30. Hi CJ,

    I didn’t have any plans for the Con, maybe if Jack twisted my arm I may go for a little while. Mostly I was hoping assorted Sci-Fi folk would make it to MRM’s house and I could crash the party. LOL I’m sure we will run into each other at some point. 🙂

  31. Baaaa!!!

    The reason I bring it up was it was something I suggested to Mike last year. I know Wil used to listen to Wingin’ It, I figured they could lure him back because of his love of podcasting and beer. *snicker*

  32. Wil Wheaton is playing Rock Band tonight – I’m hoping to play with him.

    I’m going to be visiting the Farpoint session tonight as well and looking forward to seeing the crew.

  33. I hope you guys do get to meet Wil. He was actually the guy who both introduced me to the concept of podcasting and, through his podcast, pointed me in the direction of Farpoint Media and Podiobooks. 🙂

  34. I met him briefly last night, Amy.

    I talked hockey for a few with Aaron Douglas (Chief Tyrol) earlier, which was also pretty cool.

    And apparently I should have stuck around for Wil Wheaton’s Rock Band session tonight.

  35. Looks like a fun time there in Phoenix.

    The wife and I went out and saw the new Underworld movie. Keeping in mind that it’s a prequel and ultimately a tragic story, we both enjoyed it. You would think an Underworld movie without Kate would have no chance (and maybe it doesn’t), but they did have everyone else back in their original roles and it worked well.

  36. Considering how unactiony the reviews of Valkyrie have stated, surprising number of brats in the cinema.

    One almost hopes the film is crap to teach them a lesson.

  37. So – more cool news for this weekend. I’m told that the audio production of my short story, “Creature of God” will be released tonight at Variant Frequencies. w00t for Rick Stringer! I’ll probably make a mainpage announcement here tomorrow – or late tonight. Depends on how the Con debauchery is going.

  38. This month has been super awful for pain levels, plus two trips to the ER–so far. We *really* need a weeeee.

    Hmmm…I’m officially 33% done my current Gutenberg project. Weeeeeee!

    And I earned 0.17 cents this week on Zazzle. Weeeeeeeeeeeee!


  39. Hope things get better for you soon MD.

    Morning Pan, work today..meh!

    Today’s Clone Wars saying:

    When surrounded by war, one must eventually choose a side.

  40. Oh and if you have a TI83+ or a TI84+ calculator and only use it for maths you are missing out:


  41. Last day of the Con today. Been an interesting weekend. I’ve met a bunch of cool famous and non-famous people, and had a good time. Sundays are usually the hangover day; we’ll see what this one has in store.

  42. Checked out the MWS thing. Caught the last song. I wouldn’t have been able to sit through much more due to the breaks in audio/video. You know … that’s where the image and sound all lock up a tenth of a second and then it all suddenly catches up.

    I can put up with that for somethings but not with music. You kids might not remember “skipping records” but this is the modern equivalent. *fingernails on chalk board*

  43. Amy: I guess I can “deal” with that sort of thing on chat or spoken word … even some video (like news clips) … but when listening to music (especially if it is a song you really know and like – so you are singing along in your head) those sort of breaks are like having someone who is walking behind you and keeps stepping on the heal of your shoe. meh

  44. Tiring – but fun – weekend at Phoenix Comicon. This might be the thing for us to crash in 2010, if we can’t make 2009 happen.

    w00t for Seznick’s concert – – I hope everyone had fun.

  45. So on the news BBC morning TV was a story about a study that seems to prove what we already knew in our hearts…that there are jammy gits out there that can eat as much as like and not put on weight.

    Morning Pan, grey is the colour of the day.

  46. Morning Pan!

    Spent all day yesterday without turning on my computer or i-pod, or any other electronic device – except the TV for the 6:00 news and Mythbusters at eight.

    It was kind of nice, may have to do it more often.

  47. Saw the new Underworld movie yesterday. We quite enjoyed it. For the most part I agree with Ed’s comments. Basically, if you enjoyed the first two, you’ll probably enjoy this one.

  48. Yeah, we’ve actually have had an unnaturally cold winter this year with more snow than normal. Here in Calgary we’re so used to having regular breaks with Chinooks, when that doesn’t happen, we tend to go nuts.

  49. I don’t like the cold, but I’m a tad annoyed that I haven’t had any opportunity to wear my most awesome winter coat this year. I don’t think it’s going to make it out of the closet. Maybe next year.

  50. Jack … what are you doing looking at financial thingies? Stop it, before you injure one of your valuable “creative” brain cells!


    It does look cool but I shall have to study the instructions later to see if I can figure it out. I will say that at the moment it is mostly “green” and that is always a good thing in the financial world.

  51. This is fun too –

    It is car and driver giving it’s “10 WORST cars ever” list … based on cars that, when they came out, C&D chose as their 10 “best” cars! Ah, hindsight.

    Here is a sample of why I find it a fun read.

    (re – 1990 Lincoln Town Car)
    “That included the float-tuned suspension, the Nimitz-class steering circle, the arthritic 150-hp 4.9-liter V-8, and the slough-shifting four-speed automatic transmission. At least the looks were marginally improved and, if you’re going to pass out drunk on the floor of a car, it’s hard to think of a better machine than a stretched Town Car limo.”

  52. Re: Madness – ( you are here)
    Welcome to The Drive of Fun.
    I’d think a Night Boat to Cairo would be faster than this.

    *starts singing*
    My drive, in the middle of a scan.
    My drive, might just throw it in the can.

    My drive, was where my data used to live.
    My drive, there’s no using it as is.

    *starts laughing maniacally and begins scribbling 0nes and Zeros on the wall with a crayon.*

  53. Shout out to Ed,

    do you still have that link to the website telling how to transfer podcast lists in iTunes on one computer to another computer?

  54. I don’t have it handy, but I should be able to give a definitive answer later tonight. I don’t think I called to a website. I recall it being under the Advanced menu and there is an option to export/import OPML. I don’t have a machine handy that has Itunes on it, so I can’t check it for sure just now.

  55. Damn, here I am enjoying a rum ‘n coke (Diet Dr. Pepper actually – blasphemy, I know) and the rest of the Deadpan bar has become teetotalers on me.

    Well, I guess that means I’ll have to carry the water, er, alcohol for you guys.


  56. Van,

    Looks like they’ve changed things up a bit in Itunes 8. Bring up your Podcasts. Then, it’s under FILE > LIBRARY > EXPORT PLAYLIST

    The default is a txt file, but you can choose OPML file from the drop down list.

  57. And…….. just got cool news about another story of mine. Tee Morris made something srsly cool happen – – I’m in his debt (again).

    And sorry to be a mysterious deuche, but I’m gonna have to hold off on the official announcement until all of the pieces are in place.

    Goodnight, marsh.

  58. Thanks again Ed.

    In regards to drinking, I’m passed the getting pissed stage of life, I prefer just a couple of drinks at a gig and the get the relaxed buzz.

    Morning Pan, just warming my toes near the fire..

  59. I just took down the recycling bin and selfishly thought “Wow, it’s actually cold this morning.”

    Then realized I was still taking the bin down while wearing flip flops. Clearly, I do not know what cold is. (nor do I want to)

    Keep warm, friends!

  60. Well, the historical record of bringing the 4runner into the shop every three months is still on target. The muffler went out this morning. =P

  61. Rhett, you’re making me reconsider my high opinion of Toyotas.

    Bunny, I’m still not sure what to do with those comments-by-month charts you made. They’re awesome though – and need to be put to some kinda use. Any creative ideas? Anyone? Bueller? Tumbleweed?

  62. Just heard Creature of God. It was very good, Jack.

    As for the charts, you don’t have to do anything with them. It was more and FYI… and also because J0e obviously knows how to push my buttons *glares at J0e*

  63. The opionion I am starting to form on Toyota is that they work flawlessly the first five years of ownership, then you replace every mechanical device on it from that point on. =P

  64. ACK!
    This data rescue program is still only scanned 33.6gb of the 114.5gb of data.

    I’m going to have to give up on it because I need to move my laptop and that means disconnecting my drive. It’s this very scenario that makes me completely un-excited about Terra byte hard drives.
    Does anyone else remember the days when you’d only lose 500 mb of data when your hard drive failed?

  65. On a related note, J0e, now that the data has been entered it can be manipulated and charted in any form you like quite easily. Let me know if you want something different, like bar or other type.

  66. Justa J0e – I suppose I’m too late to matter at this point, but I started hearing something about Seagate drives not allowing people to see their files when the computer was powered on? The last few days Buzz Out Loud has had some new announcement about a new firmware update that is supposed to fix the issue (and the next day, telling what else went wrong.) I don’t know if this is of any use to you, but I thought you might want to know.

  67. Also, late: *raises hands* I listen with my ear buds. I agree with … Justa J0e. The experience is more personal when the voices in my head are sometimes, well, yours.

    I’d like to be jealous about all the cool get togethers in PHX, but… If I lived there, I’d still stay at home and then I’d just be lame instead of just jealous.

  68. 500 megs? I remember shelling out big bucks for my 20 megabyte hard drive for my Amiga 500. It’d be fun to go back in time and show my 21 year old self a 4 gig flash drive. LOL

    I’ve been replaying a lot of older games lately. I realized that I hadn’t really played Marvel Ultimate Alliance since getting the HDTV, so I’ve been replaying it with different characters. I’ve discovered that the Invisible Woman (from the Fantastic Four) is quite a powerful character after a few upgrades.

  69. TEB … since you mentioned it, can you make a pterodactyl shaped graph? That would be awesome.

    My original curiosity was to look at the data and see if there was some time(s) of the year that we took a break from posting (spring, late summer, et) but I don’t think there is enough data (yet!) to get a feel for that.

  70. Did you see a sign at the border that says “Dead of Winter Storage”? Well, did ya?

    As fond as I am of our Canadian contingent, we’ve not yet reached a level of intimacy where we can share weather. Farting is OK, though.

  71. Van – neither would my calculator

    Thanks TEB … so, if I have the math right, you’d need 50 of these 200 million dollar items just to add up to 1 percent of 850 billion.

    I’m thinking that … to you or I, 200 million is a mind boggling number … but when your talking 850 billion – 200 million is barely a “blip” on the radar screen.

    While I’d rather not have the government treat 200 million as an insignificant figure, with our economy on the brink and 10’s of thousands of jobs being lost daily … holding up an entire stimulus package for anything less then 8.5 billion (1 percent of the total) in “pork” is clearly just political grandstanding.

  72. I’m still trying to wrap my head around this thing.
    I’m going to knock some zeros of to try and get some perspective.

    The Dems have submitted a list of things they say we need to spend money on right now to help communities continue to function, to try and keep people in there homes and to save us from complete collapse. The bill comes to $850 dollars.
    The other side is saying “No Way” because the list is full of things they don’t believe will help. Fair enough. These are politicians so that is believable.

    However, the one item that has been mentioned comes to 17 cents.
    How many 17 cent items could possible be in this list to make it worth throwing the baby out with the bath water ?

    If there are really hundreds of these items – Why don’t they just make a list of the items the don’t like (along with their cost) and post it on line? Get public outrage on their side.

    Could it be because there really aren’t hundreds of these items?


  73. Even if there are “hundreds” looking at the big picture, using your numbers, 100 of these 17 cent items is still only $1.70. Not a large portion of $850

  74. Yep. That’s kind of what I was thinking.
    They are probably making an 80% amount of stink over a 1% amount of crap.

    More then likely, the “foot dragging” has nothing to do with the pork and EVERYTHINGto do with whose favorite industry will receive the lions share of the funds.
    I’d be willing to bet that this is just a further extension of whether the money will go as tax breaks for the top 2% or to programs that directly help the middle classes. We only thought that argument was settled with the election.

  75. Hey guys, been sick and then ridiculously busy at work. Still, I needed to share this quote with you:

    “How far does Ms. Marvel’s body suit go up her ass? For the record, the female honesty record — that is not comfortable. Especially the way they have it drawn. That’s the kind of thing that a girl can’t wait to get home and take off.”

  76. I haven’t confirmed it. But there is a good chance that instead of a break down, I may have been victim of a theft. My catalytic converter may have been stolen. Evidently 4runners are a prime target and theifs can get between $50 and $150 for the precious metals inside. Could be $1100 to repair. Son of a bitch!

  77. All this talk about money made me realize something fantastic today.

    I never have to buy diapers again. My kids are both 100% out of diapers.

    Happy Happy Joy Joy.

  78. Rhettro – Wow!
    … to steal a catalytic converter, someone would have had to climb under your Toyota and cut through the exhaust pipe with either a saw or cutting tourch. Even if they had jacked the car up first it would have still been rather confined space for that opperation.
    Not saying that with portable power tools they couldn’t have cut it out in a hurry but It also would have also made a great deal of noise … and being under the car, not offered the villain a “quick getaway”.

    Any guy/girl that can pull off the theft of a catalytic converter without first securing the vehicle in an isolated location … has REAL balls.

  79. CR: The Watchmen

    Without giving spoilers, it will be interesting to see if they do the same flashback mode of story telling in the movie.

  80. J0e, I tried to e-mail you something earlier but it bounced back. Hopefully it comes through this time. I’ve been having a lot of problems with my e-mail lately,

  81. Since I also sent it to Jack, I should ask if he received it. Although, I didn’t receive a non-delivery notice for him…

  82. Hey Deadpan. Hellish day (and night) at work. Now I’m off to Los Angeles in the morning for 3 days. I’ll try to contribute some nipples in the a.m.

    Sweet dreams, yo.

  83. Hey JOe, (/insert obvious Jimi Hendrex reference here)

    Well I’ve discovered that catalytic theft among 4runners is on the rise. One doesn’t have to jack it up to get under it, and the tool they use to cut the pipe is like a shear, from what I understand and doesn’t make much noise. It can be done in less than two minutes. What the thiefs are after are the precious metal content of the converter itself. They can get $50 to $180 out of them. Too bad it won’t cost me $50 to repair the damage.

  84. So today’s lesson in ripoffenomics.

    Dealer’s price for fixing damage to catalytic theft to 4runner: $2300.

    Meinke Muffler’s price for fixing the same damage: $325.

    You may want to save this post for future reference. LOL

  85. So, J0e. Finally got a chance to check my personal e-mail, and it says:


    Failed to deliver to domain aol.com after 7 tries.
    Last error was:
    No recipients were successfully delivered to. ”

    You might have to poke Jack for that file as our systems have decided they no longer want to talk to each other… Maybe we should put them on a time out for bad behaviour?”

  86. Bunny, I’ve fwded the e-mail to J0e, although the joke is entirely lost now 🙂 .

    What’s the most important element of comedy?timing

    Thanks for the lesson, Rhett. No matter what happens at the dealership, you’re getting ripped off.

  87. w00t! Already received my script back from copy editor! I’m so early that I’ll get to chill for a couple days!

    OK, time to move the rest of the furniture out of the living room so I can dance with the wild toddlers of today!

  88. Thanks, Jack. I blame J0e for messing up the timing of that one 😉

    Well, 1200 pages of reports finished printing, now to file them away. Woo hoo?

  89. One last segment to record for upcoming WR episode Drops Saturday.

    I am surprised how well this is coming together – although it is an hour long… wow lots of content.

    Wednesday – Slow go…ice storm recovery begins…

  90. Decided to try a new dim sum place downstairs. Man that’s a lot of food they give you. Now must decide if I want to take a containter of food home on the train or not. It just seems such a waste to throw half of it out.

  91. I have found Heaven. My girlfriend just returned from Tequila, Mexico and she brought me a bottle of Almond Flavored Tequila.

    ZOMG – sooooo delicious.

    Did I say I’d never drink again? Dangit. I’m just no good at staying away from things that are bad for me — especially when they are soooo good!

  92. Just finished The Watchmen and I HAVE QUESTIONS!!!

    Will have to wait until my hubby gets home late tonight and discuss them with him.

  93. I’ve bribed three of the children with the promise of frozen yogurt sticks if they clean my daughter’s bedroom. They are feverishly attempting to clean it.

    Ages 3, 5, and 5 – it’s amazing to see their idea of “clean.”
    They’ll get the yogurt anyway, of course because I’m just a big softie.

    The 18-month-old is in the process of falling asleep.

    It’s a good day around here!

  94. Naw, Rhett. I’ll wait until the WatchPan (PanMen?) date has been officially announced and will discuss it then. I think spoilers will be allowed at that point.

  95. I hadn’t thought about the name of the Watchmen palooza. Rorschpan is absolutely not in the running. Neither is Naked Blue Pan.
    Anyone want to suggest a date for that Palooza episode? I just want to do it before the movie comes out, so we don’t look like a bunch of poseurs 😉 .

  96. Jack,

    Is the Watchmen something *I* could read? Being the wuss that I am and all. I can’t tell from what I’ve seen if it’s beyond my realm of wuss-ness.

  97. As graphic novels go, the violence depicted in the art wouldn’t exceed a PG-13 level. But some of the prose is pretty graphic in it’s violence. Of course that is a small part of the overall story.

  98. All of my local libraries have copies checked out until mid-February except my particular library hangout which has one on hold for someone else. Meh. I’ll have to see if the hubby owns it already. If not, I’ll just go buy it.

    Then, I need one of you all to come watch the kids while I read it. Volunteers?

  99. I would rank the reason the dog is dead as more disturbing the panel of the dead dog itself. But that event is central to the character of Rorschach. Okay I’m talking out of turn. I’ll save it for the show. 🙂

  100. CJ – I’ll say this much. I had planned on having my wife read it prior to us seeing the movie. However, I’ve waved her off of it because of a part of the story in particular with serious violence against children. That’s just one thing she can’t handle in a story and it’s often the case that, especially when a TV show decides to go there, that she’ll turn it off or switch to something else.

    I expect it will be downplayed somewhat in the movie, though I plan to check before I’d have her see it with me.

    It is a compelling and important piece of literature, no question. But it is not an easy read, either.

  101. Dan has showed me that we actually have access to the Watchmen Motion Comic on our Xbox Live. It’s not the entire content though, but if anyone wants to see it in a TV version, it looks like most of it is there for about 20 bucks.

    FYI- Dan does have it so I now have it and he’s read it multiple times. He doesn’t think I’ll be able to read it.

    I will try! Go me. 🙂

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