1,447 thoughts on “The Super-Scroll

  1. So I’m looking for a couple of books for a friend’s birthday/Xmas gift and for the first time from a big book seller I was informed the book would be printed on demand by my order.

    The future is here..ish.

    • I was curious just how fast IMDB reacts to things like this. As of 7:48 EST if you search for David Hoff, nothing pops up in the auto results. If you search for David Hasselhoff, he comes up right away. But, when you click on him, the listing is for David Hoff. A few of his listings have David Hasselhoff listed under the title of what he was in. But, as of yet, they haven’t replaced all of the listings with “as David Hasselhoff” yet.

    • I was about to give up on American Horror Story this season, but they kept me around with the elementary school incident. We’ll see if I make it through the whole season. This one is moving painfully slow.

  2. Ok Paninites, one of the best novels about AI taking over the world (albeit dated) is free on the kindle store in both North America and UK.

    Colossus by DF Jones

    It’s free, so go and give it a go.

          • And a number of restaurants….

            But you’re right. We always need to recognize and appreciate the good ones. Thank you for bringing the voice of reason, Cynful.

            Seriously! No sarcasm!

          • For work I’ve been reading up on crisis communications. One of the things that gets stressed here and there is that most people (including government officials) seem to thing that in the face of events like this people will immediately shift into panic mode and that people will turn on each other. However, all of the case studies looked at from natural disaster and terrorist attacks continually show that nearly all people involved keep their heads and immediately shift into help-each-other-as-much-as-possible mode. So, yes, there a some humans that are fuck. However, the core of humanity is good. When out instincts take over we are, at heart, social creatures that feel the need to help more than harm. At least, thinking that is how I get myself through most days.

          • More to keep in mind …
            the percentages.
            Yes, even just ONE sociopath with a gun can cause a grievous amount of carnage but we must keep in mind … at that very moment, MILLIONS of other human beings chose not to do so.
            ISIS has put out a call to the sociopaths of the planet to come and rape, pillage and kill with them … and while they have had thousands respond… the planet holds billions.

            I don’t know what solace that can bring but we must remember that these are the misfits. While they are here amount us and cause sadness, they no more represent “us” then does the Ebola virus.

  3. Well friend having the brain op phoned today, op went fine and he’s recovered some sight (still early days).

    He’s hoping to get out today.

  4. I went to see a comedian last night and laughed a lot (which was needed given the day’s events). One of the jokes to kick things off: “I’m very confused. Kansas City is apparently in Missouri. It’s almost as if Kansas looked at Missouri and asked ‘Can I just put the tip in?'”

    Try to have a good laugh today 🙂

  5. JF: A Bridge Too Farby Cornelius Ryan

    After all these years I finally got round to reading this, failures do make interesting reading.

    Richard Attenborough did a damn good job making a film from this book, some of the events I had though were movie land fiction turned out to be true.

  6. We are taking a trip.

    First. We start at Honcho hefe, the go around to Roundabout, then stop off at Sintax, folowed by Mother Earth Dubbel, then swing by for a Night Shift Nitro and end up at Imaginationland.

  7. So far so good. Avs 3-0 on the east coast road trip including a super impressive 6-1 win against the 13-3 Canadians. Perhaps there’s life yet

  8. I will say this… our current hockey league is EXTREMELY goalie centered. The worst goalie can still double the best skater in points on any given day. Something to think about

  9. The other day I told someone I worked in the publishing field. The reply, “Oh, you must know…” Really? I once got that when I mentioned I was an accountant, got it a few times for being Canadian, now I’m getting it for working for a small press.

    I’ve decided, no matter what you do or where you live, someone is going to ask you if you know a specific person who works/lives in the area.

    *sigh*

  10. I’ve decided the word turgid is not used enough in every day conversation. I think turgid is a very versatile word. You can use it to sound dirty “her nipples were turgid” or it can be used to sound dangerous, “the river was turgid so we decided not to cross it”

    And it can be used to describe the mundane as in, “this post is turgid” :silly:

  11. Hey UH!

    I wanted to thank you for the MPQ stuff. I’m not being evil by not reciprocating. I only play MPQ on my mobile device and you can’t give gifts on mobile. I tend not to play anything on FaceBook. I like to pretend I do work on my computer and having any FB games would send me down a rabbit hole I’d rather not go.

    • Interesting. To be honest, when I get certain rewards it pops up a screen to share the love, so to speak, but it doesn’t give me a choice of who to give it to. It throws 3 people up and I can either choose some or all of them, but not decide if other friends should or shouldn’t be on the list. I think I have at least 8 FB friends that play. For some reason it just always thinks you and two other people are the ones that should get all the love. I’m happy that you are one of the people and I’ll continue to throw stuff your way when the app tells me I can.

    • I disagree with some (if not all) of the comparisons. Colwyn is nothing like Luke Skywalker when you get down to it. Colwyn was raised as a prince (not a farmer), knows his real backgroud, is highly trained as a warrior and leader, etc. Lyssa is practically an anti-Leia as she really does little in the movie other than waiting for Colwyn to come and rescue her. I love Krull more than Star Wars and have seen it many times. Just taking the standard cliches that make up most movies (such as having a character that acts as a comic relief) to justify claiming that Ergo The Magnificent is just like C-3PO is somewhat lazy. Yes, Krull is a mix of fantasy and sci-fi. That doesn’t make it the bastard love child of Star Wars and Lord of the Rings.

      • And, so long as I’m apparently in a pissy mood today, I think it’s time to bring everyone else along for the ride.

        http://geektyrant.com/news/a-remake-of-christopher-nolans-memento-is-coming-soon

        Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

        • I’ve done some deep reflection on this, and I think I’m going to have to agree with TRA’s “Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!”

    • I think my feelings of disgust this film have been stated more times on the boards than Lindsay Lohan has had multiple cocks in her mouth. I know the film has its fans tho, which is why I posted it here – for those 10 people.

      Also, if they remake Memento Im buying the original and setting up a watch station outside my local theater so no one has to pay money for a third rate remake of a classic

    • So……. I can count on one hand the number of Deadpan comments I’ve edited over the past 10 years. . . . I edited this one to remove the link to the batshit extremist website that blamed the concert-goers for being slaughtered by extremist nutjobs of a different religion.

      I feel the same disgust as Pixie at this blogpost and this statement, but I don’t want any links or clicks from this website to their insanity and hate-mongering.

  12. Been quite stressed at work lately. We’ve lost some good people and haven’t replaced them very fast. The responsibility and time demands have ramped up to the point were I’m basically performing the job two levels above me, without the promotion. *shakes fist* On the other hand, being hourly, the pressure for me to work overtime is a lot less.

  13. Crap joke for the day:

    fter being away on business, Tim thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift. “How about some perfume?” he asked the cosmetics clerk. She showed him a $50.00 bottle.
    “That’s a bit much,” said Tim, so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30.00. “That’s still quite a bit,” Tim complained.Growing annoyed, the clerk brought out a tiny $15.00 bottle. “What I mean,” said Tim, “is I’d like to see something really cheap.”
    The clerk handed him a mirror.

  14. Just listened to Peter Gabrielle’s “Security” album for the first time in years.
    I had forgotten how good that is. A wonderful tapestry of sounds with Lyrics that you can just take at face value or really dig into the imagery if you feel so inclined. Music for adults.

  15. Crap joke for the day:

    An old timer was sitting in his rocking chair on his front portch when a kid comes walking by with something in his hands.The old timer asks the kid, “Hey son. Whatcha got there?”The kid replies, “I got me some chicken wire. I’m gonna catch me some chickens.”The old timer responds, “Oh son, you can’t catch no chickens with chicken wire.”A short time later the old timer sees the kid come back with a bunch of flapping chickens all caught up in the chicken wire.”Well, I’ll be…'” says the old timer scratching his head.The next day the kid comes walking past the old timer. This time he has something round and gray in his hands.The old timer shouts out to the kid, “Hey kid, whatcha got in your hands this time?”The kid responds, “I got me some duct tape. I’m gonna catch me some ducks.”The old timer laughs, “Son, you can’t catch no ducks using duct tape.”A short time later the kid comes back with a bunch of ducks caught-up and quacking in the duct tape.”The old man cannot believe his eyes.The next day the kid comes walking past the old timer, again with something in hs hands.The old timer shouts out to the kid, “Hey kid, whatcha got in your hands today?”The kid shouts back to the old timer, “I got me some pussy willow.”The old timer shouts out, “Hold on son…while I get my hat!”

  16. Today’s movie is, The Babasook

    The PVR writeup: a troubled wido discovers that her son is telling the truth about a monster that entered their home through the pages of a children’s book

  17. The movie is over.

    I really wanted to like this movie. It has a 98% on Rotten Tomatoes. But I couldn’t get around the kid. If he were a little more sympathetic, I’m sure I would have liked the movie more

  18. Hey, everybody!

    Been a crazy month between NaNoWriMo, local anime convention, school, and getting my house ready for the annual visit from my parents. However, I haven’t forgotten that Thanksgiving season also means it’s time for:

    The Annual Deadpan Secret Santa Gift Exchange!

    This Secret Santa has been going on every year since 2006. Sarah from Charleston coordinated it that first year, then I volunteered to take over and have been the coordinator ever since. I always have a blast doing it!

    If you participate in this discussion board and/or are in the “Fans of Jack Mangan’s Deadpan” Facebook group, you’re welcome to participate. I know we have a couple of new people this year, so here’s how this works:

    – The exchange is run on an opt-in basis, every time. To opt in, please send an email to bowen1138 at yahoo dot com OR amybowenwrites at gmail (I’ve been using the former forever, but there’s a lot less noise for emails to get lost in at the latter address). Your email needs to say “I’m in!” and include your current shipping address (if I don’t already have it). (We do have recipients in Canada and the UK – if international shipping is out of your budget, please let me know and I’ll make sure you don’t get assigned to them.)
    – I will assign Secret Santas on Friday night, November 27, so please get your emails to me by then. You will receive an email from me saying who your assignee is, and what their address is.
    – When you get your assignee, please send them a gift. We typically send between $10-$20 USD gifts. You will receive a gift from your Secret Santa in return.
    – (Optional) You may choose to reveal and thank your Secret Santa on the discussion board, if you wish.

    Deadpan is the merry-making way!

  19. Back in the late 90’s I had a bunch of CD’s stolen from my office and for reasons unknown to me I never replaced them. Well, until earlier this week. Picked up a bunch for cheep off of Ebay.
    I already gushed about the Peter Gabrielle CD but there were 2 others as well –
    “The Best of Elvis Costello and the Attractions” – I realize “To each his own” but this is just a slice of brilliance. A range of style, stuff that makes you want to dance, lots of stuff you just can’t help but sing along to, lyrics that tell stories. Brillance.

    The other one I got is kind of a guilty pleasure, The Sugar Cubes “The Great Crossover Potential”. It is a fun CD that seems to fall between pop/punk/garage band. I dig Bjork’s quirky voice (and getting to say “Bjork”) and the lyrics, which seem like they were translated for the group by someone who did not actually grasp the English language, give it both a fun innocence AND slightly creepy feel.

    Listening to these CD’s again is like having old friends back. I anxiously await the arrival of the 4th one I ordered, Kate Bush “The Whole Story”. I know I’m not alone in living that one (looks at Rhettro)!

    Remembering others … seems I had a Los Lobos album in that bunch and one by Morphine. I should re-add those to the list.

    • Just saw Spectre tonight. I agree with others.
      For my taste it may have been the best Danial Craig Bond … but then I didn’t like them nearly as much as the Brosnan Bonds.
      Music was forgettable. Didn’t care for how they played with the timeline of the Bond canon. Still … cool cars, action stunts and a smattering of gadgets.

      • I heart you but (with the exception of Goldeneye) the Brosnan films, IMO, are some of the worst Bonds put to film. I love the Craig films – granted I count Casino Royale and Quantum of Solace as one large film. Solace doesnt really hold up by itself

        • QoS is the only Craig 007 film I haven’t seen.

          I’ve actually managed to avoid all of the Brosnan 007s, as much as I like him and think he should have been Moore’s successor. Are they worse than License to Kill??

          • Goldeneye is great. And I love License to Kill as much as I know its probably the worst Bond film. Honestly the last 3 Bronsan films are fairly interchangeable 90’s action fluffs. Bronsnan really is a good Bond tho.

          • “action fluffs” – That IS the Bond “Genre” !
            Of course there is a wide selection of quality in the Bond “action fluff”, some much better than others but the Bond films have always been “FUN action adventure”. I too enjoy a good, cerebral, moody, action thriller but that has never been the Bond “film”.

            Based on my experience of having just watched EVERY Bond Film ever made, in chronological order … I’d say that compared to other films made in the “Bond Film – action fluff genre” “Golden Eye” is terrific, up until the final scenes when it kind of runs out of steam. “Tomorrow Never Dies” is really pretty good. Michelle Yeoh, yo.

            Now … when compared outside it’s genre to “dramatic, action adventure” films such as the Borne Identity franchise or Tom Clancy’s “Jack Ryan” movies … the Craig Films are much more competitive.

          • You incorporate Timmy Dalton into this conversation and you incorporate him NOW!!!

            You should check out the James Bonding podcast. Youd dig it.

  20. Wasn’t impressed with the first episode of Jessica Jones. I’ll give it a second to see if it improves. So far, the first episode was somewhat cookie cutter detective with hints of superhero and a few doses of artificial “edginess” to make it hip and trendy for the yoots.

    Of course, I could just be sour that I gave it a shot because David Tennant is in it…except he doesn’t actually appear in the first episode, despite the hints and voices.

    • If the comic (Alias) wasnt way ahead of its time I MAY agree with you. I found nothing artificial about it. Remember this is an episodic show and not a Marvel one off film. Nothing is just thrown in there for no reason. Remember that this is a story nearly 20 years old… again it was WAY ahead of its time in 2001. If it comes off cookie cutter now then that’s a product of the time this story is being told. I guess it would be like listening to modern hip-hop and then going back and listening to those songs they sampled from and saying “hey, Ive already head this stuff”.

      As far as Tennant not showing up, did you watch Daredevil? Again because this is a show you dont have to throw the bad guy in right away, which would have saved a few of the Marvel films. I wonder if it was a male lead if you would think they were throwing in edginess just for edginess sake? You could have said the same for True Detective…

      Mind you Ive only seen the first two so I guess they could still fuck it up mightily.

      Can I put my soapbox under your desk for now?

      • You know, I found myself equally underwhelmed by Daredevil, so I don’t think it was just that it was a female lead. True Detective I found interesting in the beginning, but I thought it flamed out pretty badly in the last episode and I never bothered with season 2.

        As for age – that’s an issue for the producers to deal with. Whatever the age of the original source, it’s airing now in 2015 and needs to appeal and engage folks like myself who don’t know the source material. Writing for fanboys/girls only isn’t enough to make a successful show. John Carter was nearly a century old story when it came to the big screen and, while I mostly enjoyed it, I think it struggled some to overcome the imagination of the early 20th century – though they did quite a bit to update Deja Thoris compared to how she was originally written.

        I’m going to give the second episode a shot and see how it goes. I don’t plan to bother with the second episode of Daredevil.

          • BTW – I really liked DD, just thought that at times they took a high quality show and aimed for the lowest common denominator with extended, on screen gore. Did we really need the extreme close-up of a spike going through the head? I think most of us could have “gotten it” with the wide shot and the sound effect. In the earlier episodes they tended to throw stuff like that in.
            Still, I’m looking forward to the next season.

          • At what point in time does one not need the extreme close-up of a spike going through the head? I’m always up for that kind of shenanigans.

    • We just finished watching JJ. I found it to be okay, with a hint of evil-mind-controller-ish. My brain can’t handle mind control right now. I don’t know if I’m ready to move forward with more episodes at this time- maybe when the Apocalypse that is 2015 ends, I will be ready to tackle JJ and her Killgrave.

      • Mostly what Pixie said. . .

        I was actually intrigued by the first JJ episode, in spite of some crap moments.

        I’m just a bit leery of a story about an evil mind-controller who manipulates people into doing horrible things to fuck up their lives just to satisfy her – – his – – twisted desires.

  21. In issue 12 of the Escape From New York comic – Native American prisoners on Liberty Island build Snake a flying car out of a glider and a rocket stunt car in order for Snake to combat oncoming U.S military fighter jets.

    Yeah its that good.

  22. You’dn ever think it, but the Dick Cavett Show retrospectives on Netflix have been fascinating slices of 70s history. We watched the Watergate one and part of the Vietnam one.

    It’s also interesting to see how stiff the mainstream everyone used to be. That’s how I remember grown-ups of my youth.

  23. So today I finished ‘Made to Kill by Adam Christopher’, a Hard boiled mystery set in an alternative world where the last robot in existence is a PI/Assassin in 60’s LA.

    I thought it was rather fun.

    • If they follow through on this I would be so happy. I still remember the golden era of Farscape and the Lexx when I could focus on a very few TV channels. I would love to see them get back to Science fiction and away from ghosts and wrestling.

          • They were just ordinary people with an unusual interest. I recently met a group including Amy Bruni, Adam Berry and Karl Pfeiffer from the Ghost Hunters groups. But even they will say that their hobby is a whole lot of sitting around and Pilgrim (the production company) was trying to get them to act like it was more exciting. Like WWF was when we were younger, script it up. The participants don’t lie about it though. They don’t claim that it’s 100% pure reality.

            I recently heard an interview saying that they believe that the OJ Simpson case was the birth of reality television as we know it. So if you’re going to blame anyone…. 🙂

          • I haven’t met any of the people from the show. I’m sure they are regular people as far as people go outside of the show. That doesn’t make the show good and it absolutely doesn’t make anything they have to say (on the show or off) right. I’m squarely putting on my asshat here and living up to my title. But, hiding behind what the production company asks them to do is nothing more than an excuse. If they truly believe in ghosts, so be it. They are free to have any opinion they want and they are free to follow whatever hobby makes them happy with no ill will whatsoever on my part. But, if they are deliberately doing things to “make the show more exciting” whether or not the production company tells them to, they are part of the problem and part of what makes shitty television on Syfy. Put the reality TV show blame on OJ Simpson, or Survivor, or Candid Camera, or Seven Up!. Wherever the blame lies, the ghost hunters are taking full advantage of it. They are welcome to take full advantage of it, they are welcome to participate to their heart’s content, and they are welcome to profit from it as much as they want. But, at some point in their lives, they have to take responsibility for what they are doing and not hide behind what the producers tell them to do.

            All told, I didn’t really mean for this to be a witch hunt of the ghost hunters. I was merely using them as an example of the shitty TV that has become so common on SyFy. I just got all bent out of shape at the notion that the ghost hunters, like everyone else in our society, are merely victims.

          • There’s an interesting point to ponder here. . . Per Cynful’s account: These guys are making a living at doing their hobby/passion, just with a few compromises. Would you do the same? I might write jokes for Dane Cook or compose songs for One Direction, if offered.

            I am a big time ghost doubter, but if they’re having harmless fun and not promoting ignorance and not feeling like they’ve undermined the integrity of the thing they love, then more power to ’em.

            Any of these guys who do spread superstition/pseudoscience and/or prey on mourners’ pain with trickery (John Edwards) deserves to be haunted by Beetlejuice forever.

          • Excellent point on blaming the producers and not the network executives. Then again, blaming the network executives was exactly what I was doing in my original post in the first place. My whole original intent was to say that SyFy used to have great programming before they focused on shows that had little to do with SciFi.

          • Plain and simple: this is a business. Back in the late 90s, the SF market was shrinking. Syfy had to get viewers back. The execs believed the way to do that was attract a wider audience. This is the same reason why many movies and shows that targeted niche audiences failed.

            So, the execs aimed for a different formula for success. And, for the most part, it worked. I don’t blame them for that. This isn’t some con job they perpetuated. The producers made shows that sold. They aimed for market conditions and did their jobs. The people in the shows also, to a varying extent, did their jobs.

            I hate reality shows. I hate wresting, slap-stick, most comedies, mysticism… pretty much everything that has been on Syfy for a number of years. And yes, that includes shows like “Ghost Hunters”. I don’t care if the people are nice. Many of these people are. It is completely irrelevant to the argument. All of these people are just doing their jobs. I have no blame for that so long as these people aren’t committing fraud.

            Syfy isn’t an educational channel and there’s no obligation for them to only show hard SF. There’s a wide range of SF stories there, and Syfy has done plenty of fantasy as well.

            Syfy isn’t some utopia of artistic purity either. And it shouldn never be. Syfy was successful with “terrible” shows. But they were terrible to me. Other people loved them. You might think they have no taste. They probably feel the same about you.

            Everything on every channel is an entertainment choice. If you don’t like it, don’t watch it. You can even wish for the show’s and network’s failure. But I’ll argue against automatically calling this stuff crap.

            Things are changing, which I think is good. And now there will be more room for shows I like. But I fully expect people will always complain about Syfy content. That’s just the way people are.

          • I suppose the grand majority of the blame should fall on the people that watch those kind of shows. Reality TV wouldn’t be prevalent if people weren’t watching it. American public, I blame you more than anyone else.

            As for the SciFi channel changing, they have always been changing. I was actually at their opening ceremonies at the Hayden Planetarium and at that time they were astoundingly different than what they became when they were producing really good shows. I suppose I can live with them getting through rough times by playing wrestling and ghost hunters if it allows them to get back to producing good shows. Just the same way that playing constant cheap reruns when they first aired gave them the money to produce some of the great shows they have had.

  24. Hubby just texted. Apparently traffic is at a standstill where they are, about half way to Edonton

    This is the second year he has attended this conference and the second year he’s been stuck in a snow storm. I think, next year, I’m not going to let him go unless they move the date to September

      • Luckily, he’s not driving. He’s taking the Red Arrow (think luxury bus). It’s still nerve wracking, at least on my part. In theory, he should have been in Edmonton, checked into his hotel, and called me by now. He figures he’s got at least another hour before he gets to Edmonton, let alone his hotel.

        Since it looks like I’m going to stay up later than usual, I’m hoping my furry alarm clock doesn’t go off too early tomorrow

  25. Hubby made it safe and sound. A normally three hour trip took close to six hours. He’s tired and hungry. Apparently on of our MLAs died today driving to Edmonton in this weather.

    Tomorrow he gets to come home in more of the same.

    Oh well. It’s past my bed time so now it’s time for sleep

    Night Pan

  26. Crap joke for the day:

    Two women who had just met at a health spa were talking about their lifestyles and how they hope to stay healthy. One asked the other to detail her daily routine.“I eat moderately,” she replied, “I exercise moderately, I drink moderately, and I live moderately.”….“Is there anything else you do?” her new friend asked….“Yes,” she said, “I lie extensively.”

  27. Tegan survived her first vet appointment. Although…

    When we took her home from the SPCA, she was a little noisy but mostly calm and quiet. This time, when I put her in her carrier and took her to the car, she was scared. She was howling, asking for attention, and generally not a happy camper. I honestly believe she was worried I was taking her back to the SPCA. Poor thing.

  28. Happy early Thanksgiving to my US Pannites!

    We have a full house this year at the Manglocks and I am thankful for that. It may never be this full again.

    I am also thankful I am not on call tomorrow!

  29. I’m in North Carolina for my yearly mmmmmeetup with the extended family. There are well over 20 of us in 2 giant beach houses for about a week. I love my family and look forward to this all year long. Yet somehow, I’m at the point where I’m glad that I have about an hour between when all the people in my house fall asleep and when I will eventually crash so that I can have some quiet time to just sit and fart around on my computer. I could be at the noisy house playing board games with the late night crowd… but I just wanted some me time tonight. Tomorrow I’ll join the late night crowd.

  30. I know plenty of Latino and Italian families that don’t have Turkey, or at least have a nominal representation of turkey and then fill the table with non-turkey meats. The extended family I’m hanging with does Turkey. My plan is to buy a bunch of frozen turkey at super ridiculous prices (I managed 49 cents a pound this year)and keep them for other times in the year. I have a few “Thanksgiving” dinners every year just because I like turkey and things I can make from leftover turkey.

  31. Hail, Panites – hopefully, wherever you were, you did your sacred duty and over ate at least as much as I did. While I’m not a turkey fan, I can tolerate it once a year as there are plenty of good side dishes to offset it with.

  32. Happy Thanksgiving, all! I had another wonderful meal with my parents, my godparents, and their friends. Good times.

    Rounding up the Secret Santa list now. Emails incoming in the next 30 minutes or so.

    • Considering the poor excuses the police have come up with when killing coloured perps the fact this guy was taking alive is also causing trouble.

  33. So, I watched the first two episodes of the Amazon Prime version of The Man in The High Castle. Not sure I like like where they are going with Joe (whatever his name is in this version to get around the fact that he’s Italian) Frank Frink (and the lack of anything he did in the novel) and the fact that Julianna Frink needed a male character to save her from a bad guy when she is a (rare for that era) extremely strong female character that should be a self defense instructor. All this in complete independence of The Grasshopper Lies Heavy being “smuggled” into the neutral countries where it is essentially legal to begin with. I think there was some discussion of it here. Is it worth continuing with the series?

  34. We finally got out to see the Peanuts movie. As a lifelong Peanuts fan, I had to go.

    It definitely goes places that Charles Schulz would not approve. But still . . . I can forgive them. It’s made with love and lots of nice little nods to the classic stuff. I’d honestly have preferred some deeper references for the devotees, but whatever.

  35. My cable provider finally started providing “Ash vs. the Evil Dead” on VOD.
    I found the first episode to be a completely way over the top, gross-out fest, hilarious fun with moments of creepy tension.
    If you liked any of the original “Evil Dead” you shouldn’t miss it.
    If you like comic action twith a “B movie” feel, that doesn’t take itself seriously and has blood, lots and LOTS of blood, gallons of the stuff… oh, and never misses a chance to show close ups of exploding heads – then THIS is the show for you.
    I’m not usually into that stuff and admit to having to avert my gaze at least twice but it just fit the “camp” feel of this thing.

    Last night I watched Episode 2 and 3. They are only about 25 minutes long. I still enjoyed them (he said hesitantly) … but the “joke” might be starting to wear a bit thin.

  36. Your crap joke for the day:

    A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas, and talked with an old rancher. He told the rancher, “I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs.” The rancher said, “Okay , but don’t go in that field over there…..”, as he pointed o
    ut the location.
    The DEA officer verbally exploded saying, ” Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me!” Reaching into his rear pants pocket, the arrogant officer removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher. “See this fucking badge?! This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish…. On any land !! No questions asked or answers given!! Have I made myself clear?…. do you understand?!!”
    The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores. A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher’s big Santa Gertrudis bull…… With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he’d sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified. The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs…..

    “Your badge, show him your fucking BADGE!!”

  37. Well, since 2015 has been the gift that keeps on giving; I can finally post a small tidbit of a possible glimmer of hope-

    The short of the long is: after 2 months of the unknown, my Mom has been diagnosed with cancer. Not just caner but a big F-U- type cancer. Stage IV lung with bone mets.

    The possibly good news here is that once the mets were discovered and my mom felt she had the freedom to express the physical pain she has been suffering with, her team of docs pounced on her with a treatment plan and she is set to begin treatment tomorrow (8 days from discovery to start of treatment), on the painful bone mets in her pelvis, hip, and leg. 70-80% chance for achieving significant pain relief.

    Here’s hoping for some fucking relief of this god foresaken fucking year for the Manglocks and our family.

  38. J0e, in answer to your question above, no. I do have a couple of seasonal movies set to record but they don’t come out until next week or so. What I do have on my PVR is:

    The Congress
    The Lazarus Effect
    Mortdecai
    The Possession of Michael King

  39. Did I mention that I finished Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell?1 Did I mention that I really dug it?2 I can’t imagine how this was translated to a BBC mini-series.

    1Aside from the footnotes, which I had to skip when I was listening to the robotext while driving. I’m going back now and reading the ones I missed. Very neat idea for a novel. . . It’s a clever way to add depth.

    2As much as I liked it, I do have a few major questions about the actions of some of the characters and how the magic system works, which could constitute plot holes.

  40. 100% of the Secret Santa assignments have been sent out, including Ryan’s (Soulier’s). To everyone who reached out to me, thank you so much for keeping me on the straight and narrow. Sorry for the confusion and delay.

    I went shopping for my DPSS gift today, too. I will try to get it shipped out tomorrow.

  41. By a single request, today’s movie is Mortdecai

    The PVR write up: Armed with only his good looks and special charm, an art dealer travels the world to find a stolen painting that is rumoured to contain the code to a bank account filled with Nazi gold.

    Because this is a more well-known I will try to keep my comments as vague as possible

    • Amy, to answer your question, I have switched to the UK or Canadian versions of Amazon to address international shipping in the past as that worked best for me. It has been several years though since I did so, so they may have corrected the issue since.

      • I too, switch between Canada and the US Amazon, depending upon who I’m sending to. They both have the same info and the login is the same no matter which one you use. Just say it’s a gift and the won’t put a price on the shipping label. However, it will say who the gift is from.

  42. JF: Codename Verity – Elizabeth Wein

    I’m not big on historical fiction (unless it’s alternative world) but this tale of friendship between two women (one a SOE operative the other a air transport pilot) In WW2 was great.

  43. Thanks for the shipping help, all. Bunny and Lo Pan are correct: It is secret until you receive the item, which is why I didn’t want to say who I was asking for.

    My gift is still sitting on my side table. I was going to ship it yesterday. Most of my plans for the day got derailed when I went and got my car rear-ended. :frown: Still dealing with insurance, so I won’t go into too much detail, but I wasn’t visibly hurt, and my car is still driveable. My rear bumper is dented pretty badly but still attached, and is going to get fixed in the relatively near future. My DPSS gift will get shipped on Monday, most likely.

  44. Received my DPSS gift today. Fantastic and perfect for me. It’s a calendar called Quotable Asshole. The only way it could be better was if it was Quotable Asshat. I’ll be sure to share some choice ones here. Thanks.

  45. WTF!

    “In a scene that can only be described as insane, multiple news sources have entered the San Bernardino terrorist suspects’ house and are rifling through whatever papers and pictures they find there. Reporters from MSNBC, CNN, CBS and unknown others have been showing the social security numbers, drivers licenses, photo albums and other presumed evidence on camera.

    According to reporters, they were let in by the landlord, who used a crowbar to remove the temporary plywood door left after police destroyed the original. Nobody seems to be able to explain why this apparent destruction of evidence is being allowed, on-camera.”

  46. Well, this is one of the worst weeks I’ve had in a very long time. I’m angry, exhaused, overwhelmed, and in pain. Not a good combination.

  47. Well, the past two days have been an adventure. We are with my Mom during the first (likely not last) hospital stay due to complications of effing cancer. Today is surgery for a pathologic bone break. Yay.

    You think one is prepared to deal with effing cancer; but that’s a foolish thought. No one can really prepare for the war that plays out between a person’s entire family and the global effects of this awful disease.

  48. I’m disgusted by the mass-shooting commentary in my Facebook feed right now.
    I get that sarcasm can be a component of debate, but it really feels harsh, in the wake of murders. I bristle every time I see “LOL” in posts/comments mocking someone else’s emotional reaction to such horror.

  49. The Muse concert was pretty amazing spectacle. There were 8 giant drones flying around for half the show, plus some innovative use of screens. Whatever you think of their music, these guys put on a great show.

    Most importantly: the kids had a great, great time.

  50. I’m looking for some advice from the Deadpan community. I’m looking to start a blog on my beer bottle collecting exploits. One of the first steps is to come up with a cool name for the blog. A labeorphile or labeorphilist is the technical name for someone that collects beer bottles (yup, there is a word specifically for collectors of beer bottles as opposed to other bottles) and I was looking for a way to use that word in the title. My first thought was “labeor philistine” but the actual meaning of philistine doesn’t really work well in this situation. “Labeorphile” is pronounced /lay bee or file/ (took me forever to track that down) so I’m thinking “Labeor of Love”. My fear here is that a) it will be too obscure for anyone to understand and/or b)it will lead to all sorts of search engine confusions involving rule 34 of the internet.

    Any opinions/suggestions? I going to keep thinking on it.

  51. Crap joke for the day:

    Paddy McCoy, an elderly Irish farmer, received a letter from the Department for Work & Pensions stating that they suspected he was not paying his employees the statutory minimum wage and they would send an inspector to interview them.

    On the appointed day, the inspector turned up.
    “Tell me about your staff,” he asked Paddy.
    “Well,” said Paddy, “there’s the farm hand, I pay him £240 a week, and he has a free cottage.
    Then there’s the housekeeper. She gets £190 a week, along with free board and lodging.
    There’s also the half-wit. He works a 16 hour day, does 90% of the work, earns about £25 a week along with a bottle of whisky and, as a special treat, occasionally gets to sleep with my wife.”

    “That’s disgraceful” said the inspector, “I need to interview the half-wit.”

    “That’ll be me then,” said Paddy.

    • We may go this weekend. Tiff’s niece did the previous 2 Hunger Games premieres with her, but bailed on the last one. (Teenagers!)

      I guess I need to actually watch part 1 of part 3, before seeing part 2 of part 3.

  52. So when riding the rollercoaster called, Battling Effing Cancer, when does
    It end? Only at death? Or could it end with a literal light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel?

    • I say this reluctantly, but it doesn’t end. There are some times that you have hope, even relief. Even when you get the statement of “cancer free” there are still tests and precautions for quite some time. I’m sorry you are going through this with your mom and it is never easy for anyone going through it or their families.

    • I had friends that pushed me to make it to the R40 show. I Can’t express how glad I am that they did. Rush was always my favorite band (at least their works before Roll the Bones) and I will miss them. But I definitely understand where they are coming from.

      Also, Neil has retired before. We’ll see how permanent this one is.

  53. Crap joke for the day:

    The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.
    Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad’s farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.”
    The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not ‘fascinating’.”
    Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.”
    The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”
    Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him.
    Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”
    The teacher sat down and cried.

  54. Oh bugger, looks like whoever got me for DPSS has not paid the correct postage or marked it as a gift, the delivery company is going to charge me import duty.

    I had thought it was a gift for my mother, but that one arrived later.

    • Such is the path of drug abuse. I feel sorry for him and his family. Once someone goes down this path, depending on the drug abused, they change their very own brain structure. As a result it may be that he was physically unable to correct his path, all do to a poor decision made in the distant past. As glib as Nancy Reagan’s “Just Say No” campaign was, she wasn’t wrong.

    • Mixed feelings reading that. She’s clearly got her own ax to grind, and deeply personal hurt from her failed relationship with this (by all accounts) difficult man.
      She’s right that he should have been present and shown some effort for his children (assuming she’s not lying – – and her statements appear to be backed up by his legacy).
      She’s right that people should put money and time into their kids, but as fans, they’ve also lost someone who, despite his failings, impacted their lives. People are entitled to mourn as fans. Lots of our heroes had dark sides – – those shouldn’t be swept under the rug, but they also don’t need to be the only thing we recall about them.
      She’s right that we as a society should not applaud or wink at self-destructive artists the way we do, when they start to circle the drain.

      I feel deep sympathy for her. It is a nightmarish, thankless job trying to make something work with a self-destructive, deeply damaged person.

  55. Just read a Facebook post from a former HS classmate agreeing with Trump’s statement to ban all Muslims from traveling to the US. “It’s just common sense!” *smacks head*

    I don’t have the energy today.

  56. Do you of you have any experience with setting up and/or participating in a meal train for a family
    Member/neighbor/parishener, etc..

    • I’ve had some of my participants be recipients of them. Unfortunately it’s been awhile so I can only speak generally and not give you the website they referred to.

    • We have Lumi at the Desert Botanical Gardens.

      The entire park is lit by luminarias and christmas lights, strung about the park. Holiday music from all genres and by various musicians occur each night. Food, wine, and hot drinks are served.

      Its so gorgeous and a lovely way to spend the holidays in Phoenix. It’s by far my favorite thing about The Valley during the holidays.

      http://Www.dbg.org

      • We need to book our tix!

        Soulier, the Phoenix Zoo also has Zoo Lights.
        Plus, Glendale has Glendale Glitters and a drive-thru Xmas lights exhibit.

        There’s a great Train Park Xmas Lights ride in Scottsdale too.

    • Same with zoo and botanical garden lights. There’s also the annual lighting of the city and county building and we have one of the larger light parades as well.

      Then there’s drinking winter beers…. which the entire state abides by I’m pretty sure

    • There are a few things that are historical and seasonal here and then there are some new things. So holiday related, we have the lighting of the Plaza lights and various light displays. There is also the Snow Princess which has recently been revived. They open the skating rinks around early November and they open the manmade snow hills usually in December. The zoo does a “Santa Dives with the Penguins”.

      Fall tends to be our biggest festival season though. It’s not as boring as it sounds

  57. I’m having an email conversation with my mom

    Mom: what does John want for his birthday
    Me: give him a gift card from Amazon.ca, then he can get whatever he wants
    Mom: ok, I’ll get him a PayPal credit
    Me: no, get him an Amazon.ca certificate. They don’t use PayPal
    Mom: you want Amazon.ca right? Not .com
    Me: yes. We are in Canada .
    Mom: did you hear about this site? You can get lots of free books

    This one I didn’t actually answer, but internally I’m thinking, “you know I work for a publishing company, right?”

    Oh, my mom. She can be so blond sometimes

  58. I opened the closet under the stairs to pull out our Christmas stuff. The cat was really excited to discover we had this whole other room she knew nothing about. And even better, it was full of small spaces for her to get in to and explore!

  59. CD: Dutch beer – Ramses Bier Formiga Sauva. The description on the bottle reads:
    vlak voor het bottelen zijn extra sauva mieren toegevoegd

    Sent through google translate that comes out as:
    just before bottling added extra sauva ants

    That is not a mis-translation. This beer is brewed with ants. It doesn’t taste any different than the other dutch beers I’ve had so far. But it will definitely be on the blog to be. I promise to get it rolling right after this trip.

  60. How do you all refer to Amy Bowen and her being the DP Ambassador?

    Is she referred to as: The Ambassador of Deadpan? Or the Deadpan Ambassador?
    Something else?

  61. Public Service Broadcasting are playing the the Science museum in London on the 22nd January and I can’t go.

    /shakes fist at work schedule.

  62. Greetings Deadpan!

    I hope all is well.

    I have received my secret Santa gift.

    I haven’t opened it yet. I’m waiting to get approval from my wife.

    Whatever it turns out to be, I’m sure it’ll be great.

    Thanks, Amy Bowen!

  63. Crap joke for the day:

    A guy is telling one of his colleagues at work: “You know, I never realized just how much my wife loved me until I was off sick last week. When the milkman and postman walked down the drive, she ran out and shouted excitedly: ‘My husband’s home!'”

  64. I rarely listen to “we’re so edgy” morning radio (and never listen to morning zoo bullshit), but I caught Emo Phillips this morning on the local “we’re so edgy” show.

    The guy is still the same, and still oddly hilarious, 30 years later. I needed that.

  65. Wisdom from Twitter:

    @Ahlephia When I see lovers’ names carved in a tree, I don’t think it’s cute. I just think it’s crazy how many people bring knives on a date.

  66. We finished MITHC last night.

    Van, what just happened???!!!????

    I don’t have a very good sci fi/bending time/ring theory/altered universe brain.

    (Not sure how JM loves me since I’m a sci-fi failure)

    • Well one theory is the Heisenberg device is a time machine or viewer into alternative universes that allowed Hitler to see where he maid mistakes and correct them and he is the man in the high castle.

      As for the trade Minster swapping universes…wibble!

      Did you enjoy the journey though?

      • I think he is the man in the high castle- been saying so since early on.

        We both are loving the series!!!!

        I just didnt see that final scene coming.

  67. CW: Madmen S7 E8

    So I’ve finally got around to starting the last seven episodes of Madmen.

    I initially thought they had jumped into the future with this episode with that guys KFC moustache and the answering machine straight out of 2001…

    • Seems to me like the poor Star Trek trailer is mostly due to a bad choice in music. Between using “modern era” music and the over-emphasis on humor, it looks very much like they are trying to make the next movie into Guardians of the Galaxy. If they had stuck to music more suited to Start Trek and cut a joke or two, I don’t think this would have looked any different that any other Trek Trailer.

  68. So, despite having a good sized pipe to the internet, I’ve often found myself unable to stream Youtube worth a crap. Stumbled upon this thread:

    https://dd.reddit.com/r/DotA2/comments/196239/block_time_warner_cable_stream_throttling/

    If you setup your firewall to block these ranges of IP addresses

    173.194.55.0 – 179.195.55.255
    206.111.0.0 – 206.111.255.255

    It will bypass some buffering servers and give a direct feed from Youtube. Took me a bit to figure out how to set it up on my particular router, but once I did, I could stream the new Star Trek trailer is all its 1080p crappiness.

  69. So… seems my DPSS recipient is experiencing some delay. Just checked Etsy to see if their item shipped and saw this message from 6 days ago (give me a break, I was traveling).

    “My brother has been in a coma and just passed away two days ago. I have just got back to the computer and will be issuing refunds. The money does not concern me, I would even consider sending you double your money back, if there wasn’t so many returns right now on my ebay from being at the hospital. This has been a horrible month but I am ready to get back to work. I must remain busy so I can stop crying. Please forgive my delay as I have always been a professional until my brother got into the car accident. Thank you for understanding; your items will be in the mail by the beginning of next week. Feel free to call me if you would like.”

    That’s a bit of a downer. I sent them a very understanding reply to see what I should do from here. If they want to still send it, they can. If not, I’ll go back to the drawing board.

  70. Meanwhile the uK press are trying to remove Helen Sharman from history because she was privately funded.

    It appears Tim Peake is the first proper UK astronaut..WTF!

  71. BTW… still working* on it.

    * – in this context, the word ‘Working’ is defined as the act of repeatedly slamming one’s head in an alternating sequence between one’s keyboard and the whole of the internet.

    • For those playing along at home, I’ve successfully determined that it is NOT an issue with the theme or with a plugin. So, it’s either a problem with WP itself (unlikely, but checkable by upgrading the install. (Which I will try later, I guess)) or caused by a server configuration change… which is what I’m betting since other sites of mine are having issues too, but not the same issues.

        • I tried the update route on a different website that is having a slight different, but just as annoying set of issues. No luck.

          I’m preparing for the nuclear option.

          Nuclear Option:
          Back Up the site.
          Save the config file.
          Save the content folder. (Themes and plugins)
          Delete the current set of WordPress files. (Database of all show and comment content is stored elsewhere and won’t be changed at all.
          Clean install WP.
          Replace config file.
          Replace content folder.

          I’m going to test this on the Sausagefest site, which is also having issues, but is currently in a really low traffic period, so there will be no impact. I want to see it work there before I try it on this site.

  72. Is anyone else having issues with the site? I get a blank page after posting, the comments RSS feed seems to be broken, and a few other things have been happening since the past couple of days.

  73. Is anyone paying attention to Ticketmaster’s “credit card only entry” paperless ticket?

    They are using this option today for Adele’s US concerts.

    Oy!

    I think I would rather go to ticketmaster outlet at Tower Records, stand in line and wait for a wristband, then come back an hour later and find out which random ticket number they are starting with and take my chances of getting tickets *that* way vs. hoping I get theough online today at 10:00AM.

  74. I don’t tend to be an anxious or angry person. These sorts of problems that were happening here and on quite a few other sites that I host were giving me both the anxiousness and the angers. Mellow T has returned. Even though I need to now do this for the other sites.

  75. Ok Pan

    Here it is.

    A Christmas Horror Story

    The PVR write up: Not even Santa is safe from the evil that descends on Bailey Downs, a small town that is suddenly plagued with malevolent spirits, zombie elves and Krampus – the anti-Santa Claus

  76. Ah, Mr. Mast, you corrected one DP issue, now I’m going to mention a new one. When I post on my mobile device, it brings me back to the top of the page so I have to scroll down for each and every post. It didn’t use to do that. I only had to scroll is I refreshed the page, not when I posted.

    Not a big deal, just thought, while you are in caretaker mode… 😉

    • Hmm… I think I might actually know what caused this. I was tweaking some code in the theme, hoping that it might make a difference for the comments page. It didn’t help, but I never pulled that code back out.

      I’ll see if doing so makes a difference.

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