330 thoughts on “Jack Mangans Deadpan #252: Lizardopalooza, Part 1

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  1. Crap joke for today:

    An old woman wanted to go to the pet cemetery with her dead cat.

    As she boarded the bus, she whispered to the driver; ‘I’ve got a dead pussy.’

    Driver points to the seat behind him,and says; ‘sit next to the wife you 2 have a lot in common.’

  2. Today’s political comment.

    How(why?) can you run for President if you show open disdain and public mockery for nearly half of the people you claim to want to represent? 47%, that’s over One Hundred and 46 MILLION American’s he just called a bunch of whining free-loaders.


    So how is it when the other guy says he wants to help the 99%, HE is accused of being divisive and trying to start class warfare?

    These guys are trying to make me nuts.
    That is all.

  3. Spent yesterday under the house repairing plumbing.
    Oh I so hate plumbing.
    Took all day and 3 separate trips to the hardware store.
    About to go back under the house to see if all the seams have held.
    I hate plumbing.

  4. Jack Mangans Deadpan #252: Lizardopalooza, Part 1

    Thanks to all those who contributed to the Buckaroo Bonzai Palooza

    Today’s Palooza submissions by:
    The Energizer Bunny & Mr. Bunny
    Little Mangans

    John ditto
    John The Energizer Bunny
    John Amy Bowen
    John John Boze
    John DJ Bunny
    John EssBee
    John Justa J0e
    Perfect Rhettro
    John Ed From Texas
    John Vanamonde Bigbooty

    More Buckaroo Bonzai submisisons by:

    You can still send in Buckaroo Bonzai content.

    Send in content: 480-788-JMDP(5637) or e-mail: sphericaljackmatgmaildotcom

    Closing Music

  5. Vous commencez une conversation, vous ne pouvez même pas finir.
    Tu parles beaucoup, mais vous n’êtes pas en train de dire quoi que ce soit.
    Quand je n’ai rien à dire, mes lèvres sont scellées.
    Dis quelque chose une fois, pourquoi le répéter?

  6. My son: “Konichiwa!”
    My wife: “Did you just say “konichiwa”? Awesome!”
    My son: “Yeah its the only word I know in Spanish”
    Me: *facepalm*

  7. Today’s slightly strange spam:

    Hello, This is Mr Andrews, I want private lessons for my daughter, Mary. Mary is a 14 year old girl, home schooled and she is ready to learn Please, I will like to know if you will be  capable and available for the tutoring service because I really wish the tutorial begins Last week of September, 2012 and if you are going for any trip let me know the date you will be back  Break Shall be Observed), also do get back to me with the following details about you:

     Your Name:

     Area of Specialization:

     Years of experience:

     Your Location:

     Your charges per hour $:

     Your Phone Number:

     I will be glad to read back from you soon so that i can keep in touch with my daughter  bout the progress of her tutorial.

     My best regards,
    Mr. Hart Andrews

  8. I just went by the grocers to pick up a cantaloupe.
    When I got to the produce section I found they had them on sale, two for one price (as it is the end of the season, I suspect they are trying to unload them).

    As I only intended to purchase the one item I had not brought a cart or basket with me.

    There is no way to carry two melons by hand that doesn’t scream of innuendo.

  9. The upgrade to iOS 6 went smoothly. If you are a fan of google maps you may want to give it a miss.

    Of course us dinosaurs still running original iPads can’t upgrade at all.

  10. Apple has fucked up podcast playback in iOS6. No longer can you mix music tracks and podcasts on a playlist, you need to use the Apple podcast app to playback podcasts (or do a search for a particular episode and then that can be played back in the music player app).


  11. I have been playing SongPop for a few weeks now and, while I don’t consider myself an expert on 90’s Alt or 00’s Rock, I find it really odd that I’d never heard anything by Muse or Anberlin before this game.

    Also, I didn’t realize Train had been around the while time.

    And why is Good Charlotte in the Punk genre? I can understand Blink-182 (barely) but Good Charlotte? Nope.

  12. I’m gonna continue to be spotty over the next few days. And so will my board presence.
    I will check in when I can. Y’all are the mfing way.


  13. Well, thanks to Van’s taking one for the team and warning me of the full horror of IO6, along with my learning through other sources that, even with the $30 adapter, the lightning connector won’t allow my car to control a new Iphone/Ipod – I’ve sprung for a refurbed fourth gen Ipod touch. My second gen touch has served me well, and if it were just the cracked screen, I’d keep with it. However, the headphone jack is also in the process of failing and that is kinda important.

    So, looks like I’ll be frozen in time with IOS5.something and Itunes 10.still supports podcasting….

  14. I’ve actually got a pretty busy day/weekend planned.

    Hubby’s father is coming into town to attend the memorial for Hubby’s uncle. Our guest room has become more like a storage room so I have to clean it out. The, sometime over the weekend, we will have to take a bunch of stuff to the dump.

    As per usual, my life is very exciting.

  15. Put in a couple of hours of Torchlight II yesterday. I’m actually putting it aside for a bit. I want to finish LA Noire. Then I’m going to load up Assassin’s Creed Brotherhood and Revelations. I’ve played the first two but thought I would run through these before Assassin’s Creed 3 comes out in a month(ish)

  16. Ow!

    Started to put together the stuff for a sauce to put on fettuccine tonight. I cut myself on the lid of the tomato paste. While it’s not deep or long, there is still blood everywhere and it’s not really in a convenient place for a band aid

  17. Today’s movie is: In the Name of the King 2

    The DVR says: An elite Special Forces soldier travels back in time in order to help a downtrodden people rise up against their oppressors.

    I played all three dungeon Seige games and I don’t remember that plot line. I also saw the first one with Jason Statham. Ok is about as far as I would go with it

  18. Morning Pan

    I have lots of thing I want to do today. Hubby says he doesn’t want to do anything because we are going to the symphony tonight. Personally, I fail to see the connection but who ani to argue with the idea of having a lazy dat *shrug*

  19. Hello, Pan.

    Recently, Jack mentioned that he would like to see an update about how life is treating me in Nebraska, and how it compares to California. Here’s a semi-longwinded but far-from-exhaustive update.

    Fall is in the air already here. I’m amazed that I’ve already experienced a couple of days when it’s been just a little too cold for open-toed shoes, especially in the mornings and evenings. Yeah, I know, I’m a lightweight. On the bright side, I do already have ski gloves, warm boots, and a big, puffy winter coat, so I’m on my way to being ready for winter.

    I’ve pretty much finished the settling-in process by now, at least as far as administrative matters go. My new driver’s license arrived at least two weeks ago. This past Monday, I finally got my car re-registered and put my new Nebraska plates on it. That was a huge relief, because it was one of the last big items left on my list of moving-related “to do”s. Tonight, I crossed another one off the list. In a few days, for the very first second time, I will have my own mobile phone plan, instead of being on my family’s plan. (Oh, yeah – I did have my own while I was living in Japan.) The only really big “to do” that still remains to be done is putting together my new desk, which I hope to accomplish Monday or Tuesday. After that, I can start over with a whole new round of “to do”s. 🙂

    I’m loving my new church and the people there. I’m still not used to the narrow streets and the absence of limit lines at most intersections. On the whole, though, things are going really well. I’m liking my job more and more, and getting a better and better grasp on it. :happy:

  20. What music does John Flansburg listen to?

    “My most recent itunes purchases in order Fela Kuti, Bob Dylan, Matt and Kim, Lou Reed, SBTRKT, The Ravonettes, Redd Kross, Newcleus, The Knitters, Skeeter Davis, Fiona Apple.”


    All the Thai food and the must see TV, yeah
    Keeps ya subdued and unable to breathe, yeah
    Chase a carrot stick in your Volkswagon Bug, yeah
    All the limp dicks and their verility drugs and the Chinese pugs, yeah

    Hey, come on we’re all defanged and declawed
    We’re creature comforted
    Don’t need anything, we all get what we want
    And we want

    Hey, come on we’re all defanged and declawed
    We’re creature comforted
    Don’t need anything, no there’s nothing at all
    And you’re tucked in tight, you sleep alright, and you won’t bite
    We’re all defanged and declawed

    It’s the satellite, and your DVD, yeah
    Keeps you inside, it keeps you off of the street, yeah
    And the payments, payments keep you alive, yeah
    Sulfonation, it gets you on anytime, America online, yeah

    Hey, come on we’re all defanged and declawed
    We’re creature comforted
    Don’t need anything, we all get what we want
    And we want

    Hey, come on we’re all defanged and declawed
    We’re creature comforted
    Don’t need anything, no there’s nothing at all
    Like dominoes in neat little rows you are what you owe, yeah

    Yeah, hey, come on we’re all defanged and declawed
    We’re creature comforted
    Don’t need anything, we all get what we want
    And we want

    Hey, come on we’re all defanged and declawed
    We’re creature comforted
    Don’t need anything, no there’s nothing at all
    And it keeps you down in surround sound until you drown
    We’re all defanged and declawed, declawed, declawed
    We’re all defanged and declawed, declawed, declawed

    Goodnight, America

  22. I bought the new Humblebundle. Even though it will be ages before I get to play most of them, I’m enjoying Dustforce, a platform game about cleaning that is rather good, who would have thunk it.

  23. Well Pan, sitting the cinema waiting for ‘Looper’ to start.

    Oh and elasticated belts are a wonderful invention, saved my modesty when rain soaked my jeans enough to make them a lot heavier than usual…

  24. Tonight’s classic Star Trek episode is ‘The Changeling’, the inspiration for the first ST movie.

    I wonder if the guys behind Dark Star were inspired by Kirk’s logic Fu.

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