1,012 thoughts on “Jack Mangans Deadpan 156: Run For Your Lives

  1. I’m glad I’m not the only one up way too goddamn late.
    dreadpirate, I believe the smiley snafu was the character adjacent to the colon. There needs to be a space.

    :jack:

    Goodnight, awesome ceiling :cth: t-shirt 🙂

  2. Um did anyone else realize that Jacks sentence –

    “I believe the smiley snafu was the character adjacent to the colon. There needs to be a space.”

    may be the best sentence ever written?

  3. I’m too tired to write a sentence that isn’t of nonsense and I was going to say something funny about the adjacent to the colon thing as well.

    Starting coffee iv drip now.

  4. reaper when you have time you should check out the last episode of that Jay and Jack Lost podcast. Good good detail on the names. Highly Lo Pan approved. Check it before you wreck it!!

    CP: JACK FUCKIN MANGANS DEADPAN PODCAST fuckers.

  5. I immediately started singing the song as soon as I saw the title of this episode. When I got it downloaded, I skipped to the end to see if it was the song used. I was right, it was. 🙂

  6. LOL Moment 1: “The Cuter King”
    LOL Moment 2: Jack’s impression of me.

    Awesome stuff.

    About the end of this episode of Questers from EffPeEm: Does this mean that Jack is related to Beetlejuice?

  7. I agree Lo Pan. Semi-helpful is the best I would give it. Some info is some what handy but nothing earth shattering. It is usually “Remember in Season X when X happened. Keep that in mind as you watch this seen.”

  8. ComputerKing: Heheh! I didn’t have Beetlejuice in mind when I created the rules of my story or wrote that scene, but I guess in-story Jack and Beetlejuice are cut from the same cultural-background cloth. I think the idea of a supernatural entity appearing when someone says their name X times is older than either of those stories and inspired both of them.

  9. I also think it’s charming, EssBee – – but I won’t run it in the future, if it makes you cringe.

    Relevant results from last night’s hockey:

    Cj’s Swedish men finally lost – – to my Slovakians.
    Vanamonde’s Fins beat ditto’s Czechs.

  10. MMMmmmust talk to :jack: about MMMmmmeeetup.

    Should I page him to the :pan: phone?

    I’m guessing we don’t have a :bat: phone. See? I put a bat between my colons and nothing happened.

    It’s all :alien: to me.

  11. Bank visit successful. Paperwork submitted. Identity reclaimed. Apparently someone in Texas really needed gas. And someone in Tennessee, and Palm Springs, and Big Springs. Oh, and someone in Mew Jersey REALLY needed Taco Bell.

    ok. Venting over. 🙂

  12. it’s more of a pain in the ass than anything else. glad I’ve got a bank that’ll cover this and even if they didn’t, I’ve got identity theft on my homeowners insurance.

    Hmm…. I now have a valid excuse for not making i to the mmmmmetup! I’m $400 lighter (well, it’ll be back in my account before mmmeet up, but hey).

  13. I may have mutated into a CASUAL gamer (eeeeek!).

    Been playing the trial version of Plants v Zombies and err..um..it was fun.

    I’ll get my coat.

  14. Well, that was it, as of 4pm or so, no job, no pay for three weeks of work, no insurance…

    Had some close friends over tonight for support (& they brought pizza & beer, yay).

    Tomorrow, apply for benefits, go to Workforce center to see what they have, consider options for mortgage modifications or short sale of house…

    Maybe we need to find a van, as we already live near the river…

  15. American TV just showed the medal ceremony for the Canadian women’s hockey team. Watching an entire stadium full of people singing along with “O Canada” was MADE OF AWESOME. I sang along, too. 😀

  16. Want to look like a weirdo in a coffee shop? Just wait for a rainy day and proclaim in the queue that you love the rain to the staff.

    If looks could cook, I would have been well roasted.

  17. Catching up:

    Lo Pan – our bet included women’s hockey (go ahead, look back and confirm), you owe us a Canadian National anthem

    JB – *hugs*

    Van – I like the rain too. Everything smells nice, the sound is relaxing and, in a thunderstorm, it’s very pretty to watch.

  18. Yknow I gotta say tho that the US has shown up big time for these games. I didnt think theyd break 25 medals, let alone 30. SO thats good to see. Cool that Canada is tied for the most gold as well. Own that podium, Canadia! ;P

    Did you see the US women crying after they lost? HOW BOUT YOU SHOW UP AND PLAY SOME HOCKEY INSTEAD OF FIXING YOUR MAKE-UP!?!?!?!?!?

    *runs Superman fast*

  19. Yeah, Lo Pan. There’s actually been a lot of flack by the press and government because we haven’t got a real high overall medal count. However, I feel this does the athletes a disservice. This is a record number of gold medals in a winter game for Canada. Also, we have the same number of gold as the US. It is the gold medal count the IOC uses to determine winners, not overall. The US instituted a similar program 20 years ago. When it first came in, they got a whopping 6 medals total. It took them 20 years to reach their very large medal count. Give it time Canada. And lastly, way to put pressure on, and bring down the athletes. “Oh, we don’t have the medal count of the US so our athletes are doing terrible”. Gotta be good for the self esteem. Still more sports to compete in.

  20. Ive been reading about that flack in the Suns (Vancouver and Calgary). I dont think its real fair to the athletes but whatever it takes I guess. Seems to take away from the silver and bronze winners determination and hard work tho., You put too much emphasis on gold and you end up crashing and burning.

    Right, like I said Canada is tied with golds (US and Germany) so thats what I said is cool. Tho I think the IOC’s determination of a “winner” through gold only is idiotic. Actually the notion that a country can “win” the whole games is dumb in the first place.

  21. Forthwith here, Feb 26 2010, EssBee (Defendant) is hereby determined to appear in front of a court of law as one Lo Pan (Plaintiff) deems it necessary and wishes to collect damages of an unspecified amount due to said Defendant finding one Simon Cowell attractive.

  22. Tip for American Idol contestants: You can’t pull off Stevie Nicks’ songs. Or Heart songs. Or Beatles songs.

    Boo.

    I just like the guys with the bitchiness.

  23. Listening to the Stuff Mom Never Told You podcast. They said, to avoid the problems associated with women’s fashion and self image, clothing should be banned in general (they were kidding). That’s fine for peeps who live in warm places like Arizona, what about us northerners who’d freeze their tootsies off?

  24. I’d be happy with a silver or bronze medal.

    Little known medal fact (or maybe greatly known *shrug*): Each medal seems to have a slightly different design on them. Put all the medals together and they form one giant mosaic. I’m assuming someone took a picture of the design before they were given out, but am having trouble finding such pic.

  25. Which is odd cause almost all of em have measurements on their profiles. I was marveling at the lesb…er..women’s hockey players measurements the other day. Them girls would destroy me.

  26. TEB: I agree 100% with your sentiments about Canada’s medal count.

    Lo Pan: I agree with you, too. I think it’s stupid to think of an entire Olympic Games as having only one winning country.

  27. I was watching the ski jumping Saturday, and the asshat commentator kept saying “fat doesn’t fly!” He said that a 6’2″ skiier (male, now) at 150 lbs was too heavy.

    Ridiculous!!

    Also, there is no crying in lesb . . . women’s hockey. Total fail.

  28. Yeah arrogant Americans! Own the podium!!!!!
    (Sorry EB, had to ;P )

    I think Im just gonna run around the city shouting “fat doesnt fly!” at whoever I see.

  29. Mass Effect 2 – you need 11.7GB of free disk space to install.

    Good thing I’ve got a terabyte hard drive, but still. That’s a lot of data.

  30. Lejon, Lindsey won ONE medal “injured”. So she fell? She’s fallen in ALL of her events but the one she one gold in. all i’m saying is dont come in with the label of “America’s Best Women’s Skier EVER” and “The Michael Phelps of Skiing” and fall 3 or 4 times. Perhaps it was not her fault she was labeled that, but she was labeled it nonetheless. For a reason. So yeah, to rebut your point it IS unexpected for her to fall and crap out like this in these games. Sorry, just is.

  31. Oh, I suppose I could be controversial and start mentioning that in her gold medal event, while Lindsay was coming down the hill, ahead of pace, every little misstep she made got pointed out by the commentator, including the fact that she was favoring her right “injured” leg:

    “oh, that was a mistake… oh another mistake.” etc.

    So, I guess we can all be sure that Lindsay knows, and will know for the rest of her life, that she got that gold medal making an imperfect run, and she’ll have to live with that for the rest of her life. I only hope the gold medal will make up for some of the mental anguish she’s going to go through over how imperfect and flawed she is.

    Sheesh.

  32. Dudes … quantifying any of these athelets skills is NOT based on whether or not they ever fall. It’s based on their finishing records.

    If those who actually follow the sport have called him/her the best … that would likely be based on their over-all performance, not in just the one or two races you watch every 4 years. Further more – maybe, just maybe … to win more than anyone else you have to ski right on the edge of disaster, which means sometimes you fall.

    add me to the “Sheesh” list.

  33. I hope so too. Once youre told youre the best ever in something when youre clearly not… yes I’m sure thatll be a wonderful crash back down to earth. Do like it? Dont accept all the fucking accolades to begin with.

  34. Cool. Then if shes been that good her entire career she shouldnt have fallen 3 times because shes good enough not to do that. “Sometimes” isnt falling 3 out of 5 events. Just isnt. Maybe, just maybe, she didnt deserve all the hype she got in the first place.

  35. Final question before I decide to work again…. US has a speedskater by the name of Nancy Swider-Peltz Jr..

    Can…one BE a “Junior” if one is a female? I guess technically… just odd to see.

  36. JR!!! Oh Ive been loving Charlie (ew) this whole year. You know theres shirts at Hot Topic, right? Course that means actually entering a Hot Topic…

  37. I’ll be talking to Rich Sigfrit during the Boom Effect at 1pm tomorrow – and I’m not sure when, but I believe they’re going to be running some video content from me too. I hope you guys can check it out. http://www.theboomeffect.org.

    Looks like Slovakia almost pulled it off. Almost. A personal anthem, ay? Oh, Canada. 😉

    All right, I’m off. Goodnight Candy Mountain.

  38. Morning Pan

    In for a couple of hours. Stupid month end. Then out, so will miss The Boom Effect.

    Saw the last ten minutes of the game. While Canada won, it wasn’t a pretty win. I’m starting to have my doubts about tomorrow’s gold medal game.

  39. Sonic Boom/ Mmmmmeetup mashup

    Saw this item –
    http://www.theboomeffect.org/?p=390

    SB066- Beer Tasting event
    I will organize a private beer tasting for you and 5 of your friends.

    I was thinking that if a bunch of the MMMmmmmeet Up participants were to pool their funds and win this item … the “flight of 10 beers will showcase the range of modern craft brewing.” could be held during one of the MMmmmeet Up events.

    Doesn’t THAT sound like fun!!!! 🙂

  40. Good luck with the Boom Effect stuff today.

    As an FYI, I know I haven’t mentioned it, but I’m in Hawai’i and under a tsunami alert. Should be fine, but I’ll let you know.

  41. I’m looking for advice from the wonderful tech-savvy people here. I want to do what seems to me like a fairly simple thing. I want to set up gmail (preferably) to send in a single contest entry per day email to Slice of SciFi for a set period. Every time I look to do this, all I can find is information on auto reply emails (which require that someone email you first), spam programs that allow for a single job of sending out one email to a large number of people, and one program that will send out a maximum of 20 emails in a month without paying $50. Does anyone know of a free way to simply send out one automatic email a day for a specific period of time?

  42. UH, if you have Outlook 2007 (I think all versions actually do this) you can create all of the emails and then set a delivery delay on them. The only issue would be that your Outlook has to be open at the time you want the email sent in order for it to generate the outgoing email.

    You’d just set up your gmail account in outlook and create all the emails at one time and set each to a different delay.

    That’s the only way I know you could do this.

    http://office.microsoft.com/en-us/outlook/HP052427901033.aspx

    Someone else might know something better.

  43. So far, we’ve had about 4 minor 3′ waves hit Hilo Bay. Nothing major. Fingers crossed, but it looks like nothing bad will happen around here. I figure so long as they are landing planes here on O’ahu then things are fine.

    Vacations. I can pick ’em. I thought this was supposed to be stress relief! 🙂

    Enjoy your weekend guys.

  44. Just finished putting together the climax of The Questors from Effpiem, Season 1. I’m really, really happy with it and very excited to share it with you. (Still have the rest of the episode to finish, though.)

  45. Ah found it:

    New Year’s Eve is coming back
    Gone around the zodiac
    Raise a beer for one more year without a fatal heart attack

    There’s no time for pessimists
    So make your resolution list
    Knowing you’ll most likely break them all by January fifth

    Resolutions!
    Every year the same charade
    Resolutions!
    These are some that I have made

    Build a robot servant girl
    Invade and conquer Disney World
    Overcome my meth addiction and my rabid lust for squirrels

    Stumble upon a cancer cure
    Appear on Ninja Warrior
    Start a business that produces chocolate office furniture

    Resolutions!
    Learn to play the clarinet
    Resolutions!
    Keep a sandwich as a pet

    Beat a five-year-old at chess
    Play rugby in a wedding dress
    Press the big red button that they say I’m not allowed to press

    Organize my music files
    Buy some art from TV’s Kyle
    Buy some Zubaz in the naive hope that they come back in style

    Resolutions!
    Trade my arms for tentacles
    Resolutions!
    How is that not sensible?

    Fix the world economy
    Write some haiku poetry
    Have a plastic surgeon realign my nipples vertically

    Sell my soul to Lucifer
    For twelve White Castle hamburgers
    Become the Queen of Jupiter, this song is getting stupider

    Resolutions!
    Wear a giant purple pimp hat
    Resolutions!
    Translate Tolstoy into lolcat

    Lead the NFL in sacks
    Drink a case of BRUTOMAX!
    Learn to breathe alfredo sauce and teach the violin to yaks

    Mow my friends’ and neighbors’ lawns
    Get my favorite t-shirt bronzed
    Sneak into the Vatican and give the Pope a purple nurple!

    Resolutions!
    I should look at dieting
    Resolutions!
    And not eat while I’m trying to sing

    Donate to a noble cause
    Get a healthy liquor buzz
    Find out what this button does

  46. Morning Pan!

    Have a car for a few hours – woo hoo. Means I’m off to the grocery store, since I couldn’t go on Friday, then will be back in time for the big game.

    This is Canada’s last shot to break a record. They (we) are currently tied with the Olympic record for the most gold medals during a winter game. Although, to be honest, I think the US has a better shot at making gold. Damn Americans. :angry:

  47. It looks like I’m going to not have a car of my own for another week but life will be back to normal next Saturday. It’s a good thing too. Hubby and I were already talking about how to get me to the airport on the 11th if I didn’t have a car.

    I live at the far end of the city opposite the airport so a cab ride is $70 one way. The park and jet is $15 a day – for 5 days = $75. You do the math on why I drive to the airport.

  48. Prediction –

    Canada 3
    Damn Americans 4

    Just going off what Ive seen thus far. Could be just wishful thinking. Either way Im looking forward to (hopefully) one great hockey game. Honestly for a team picked to finish up 4th or 5th, even just getting the Silver fuckin kicks ass. And thats the…SILVER LINING if the US does lose.
    *rim shot*

  49. I understand the plan now. For Canada, it’s not about getting more goals, it’s about stopping the US from getting any more. Sheesh.

  50. What comes to my mind though, Ignla played a hell of an olympic series. What kind of a player would he be if hewas put on a team with real front liners, instead of being the one trying to hold the team up?

  51. Boy the US team looks grumpy as they are receiving their medals. I personally think they did great and should be very happy and proud with their silver. They worked damn hard for it.

  52. There. Tomato chili pork chops in my tummy. Hop Head IPA in front of me, ready to be consumed. Bring on the closing ceremonies (in 40 minutes)

  53. Just finished watching the latest episode of Caprica. Even though it’s slow moving, I’m enjoying the show. I hope Ron Moore will be given enough time to start brining the ends together.

    Now… ready for closing ceremonies.

  54. Nope, he was a fixer mime. Then Catrona lemay Done came out of a hole in the ground to light the torch. She was the one who just stood there during the opening ceremonies because her piece of the torch didn’t work for her to light.

    Then a bunch of people dressed in white, carrying fake snowboards came out and danced around. It was very confusing

  55. Meanwhile, hubby is looking up idols I can get for my D & D character. I’m getting the ivory goat of Trevail (sp?). I guess he turns into a goat for 8 hours and has such powers as ram’s charge.

    This too is very confusing.

  56. Holy crap. We have the Canadian version of Menudo sining the Canadian national anthem.

    Say it with me… it’s very confusing.

  57. Of course, I go on about Canada’s record gold medals, however the US won a record number of total medals in any Olympic games. Good job. Don’t care what anybody else may say, you obviously worked hard and therefore deserve what you got.

  58. NBC put together a really beautiful montage of a bunch of event-winning and medal-ceremony moments, set to “O Canada.” I loved it.

    TEB said: Of course, I go on about Canada’s record gold medals, however the US won a record number of total medals in any Olympic games. Good job. Don’t care what anybody else may say, you obviously worked hard and therefore deserve what you got.

    Thanks! 🙂

    All this time, my mom and I have been wondering why the bouquets of flowers they give to the medalists are always these ugly green things. My mom jokes: “Can’t you grow any good flowers in Canada? If you can’t grow any good flowers in Canada, why don’t you just give them a branch of a pine tree or something?”

  59. Blah. NBC is showing their stupid new series “The Marriage Ref” for an hour, then showing the rest of the closing ceremonies at 11:30. I got as far as the end of the big, strange musical number with the giant beavers and moose. Forget that, I’m going to work on this podcast a little bit more and then go to bed.

  60. Okay, I’ve put all the creative energy I have into this episode. Time to go to bed and recharge.

    I’d like to end the night with this final thought on the Olympics:

    I am very, very happy and proud of how Canada fared in this year’s Olympics. I rooted for Team Canada a lot over the past two weeks. My entire 2010 Winter Olympics experience would not have been nearly as fulfilling, or nearly as much fun, if I hadn’t had friends from there. Thank you, TEB and ditto, for being my friends. My heart is glowing tonight, too.

    Good night, Pan.

  61. Well Pan I’m in a mood for a naff movie, off to see that new Travolta flicks, all reviews I’ve seen suggest it’s a bit of a traincrash…woot!

  62. As for the flower thing, despite thoughts to the contrary, Canada has all the modern conveniences; indoor plumbing, hot and cold running water, central heating, and… greenhouses. Honest, I don’t live in an igloo.

  63. Good morning, DP!

    Van, I love Being Human. We saw the actress who plays the ghost on Dr. Who and got very excited. She’s purty.

  64. That’s sweet, Lo.

    As the day will for sure go unrecognized here, I might have to leave early or something just for my own reward-seeking ego. Or maybe I’ll see if I can find Mark.

  65. I know everybody is having bad work news, but we got some good news. Hubby’s getting a raise and they’re making it retroactive from September. That means a six month bonus payment in March. Now, what to spend it on…

    – Actually, I told hubby it’s his to do with what he wants. I see another guitar in our future…

  66. EssBee: The ghost is certainly purty, mostly ‘cuz of her quirky mouth.

    And congratulations/condolences on doing a decade. I’m 8 months from my decade with “We Make The Best Stuff That The Internet Has Made Obsolete!”

    WMTBSTTIHMO for short.

  67. “Perfect to wear with jeans, a leather jacket and a motorcycle- nothing more…”

    Going commando, and what’s under that jacket?

    Are they comfortable to wear in bare feet. Sometimes, without socks, boots will leave blisters.

  68. I’m not too worried about how they were with bare feet. I assure you, my siblings aren’t certain I even have feet inside my socks (I don’t. Just black holes waiting to be contained in socks again.)

    [makes scary eyes]

  69. Amy, the Truth is sometimes a powerful thing. Even when it means obsolescense.

    Obsolecense. Obsolete-sense. Obsolesense. WHAT THE FROG?

    Obsolescience.

    Obsoleciense. Obsolecience. Obsolesiense Obsolesience.

    Obsolescents.

    [twitch]

  70. Maybe all of the female athletes for Winter and Summer should be required to wear burkas and big fluffy jackets during their events, lest any of the viewing audience see them and have sinful thoughts.

  71. What, a man can’t admire a woman who knows how to handle a …

    Okay, I guess there is a little bit of innuedo there. But, I don’t really remember seeing an unattractive woman pole vaulter.

  72. You know, after seeing the crap the Nintendo pulls (locking downloadable games to a machine rather than an account), I’m appreciating Steam all over again.

  73. Hi! I like innuendo. Yes there were embarrassing parts of the Closing Ceremonies, but I did enjoy what NBC aired. Like Amy, I wasn’t interested in watching the Marriage Ref. Congrats to the Bunnies and EssBee. Hope everyone else is doing well too. Later.

  74. Mister Jack Mangan: No. Cobra Commander is a dick. That’s funny onna acount that he became a snake at some point. ‘course, he had to get fixed. His face got better lookin’ though.

    Nah, if he came by the Strong Back, Weak Mind, Moving Co., our friendly Trolls would accidentally drop a house on him then steal his shoes…

  75. I never watched the GI Joe cartoons when I was a kid, or read the comic (was there a comic? I seem to think there was). We did however, see an episode fairly recently, I don’t think it held up over time. And I saw the movie. Does that count?

  76. [GI Joe nerd rant] The comic was about 1billion times better than the cartoon, let alone that goddamn bullshit fucking movie. Actually both the 80’s movie and the movie that shall remain nameless of last year were terrible. The comics were smart and (usually) well written and the origin stories were generally far above and beyond that of the cartoon. [/Gi Joe nerd rant]

  77. I didn’t see hte Dennis Quaid movie. My G.I. Joe experience as a kid was 97% with the toys. I’d found the cartoon somewhat disappointing, and only occasionally read the comics. Then I grew up and got mature.

  78. Do you know it’s 5:30 in Ontario. I point this out because I’m suppose to get some reports from there in order to finish up my month end. I sincerely hope they were planning on staying late. They are not allowed to leave until they FIND MY MONEY!!!!

  79. I operate on Ontario time. This means I’ve been at my desk since 6:15am, which is 8:15 in Ontario. As such, I’ve been at my desk for well past the normal eight hours office time. I think my butt is going numb.

  80. TEB: I’d like to point out that Here in Arizona, we also do not live in igloos, but we occasionally live in adobes.

    I completely missed the last couple days of the Olympics. Missed the closing ceremonies and all the apparent weirdness with it.

    Instead, I had a wedding anniversary party, and spent time with the wife.

    Oy, Canaday… Congratulations!@#?!

  81. Van, I read somewhere once:

    Sleep is a truce
    Death a surrender

    I don’t think I’ve ever really understood that but, for some reason, I always found it profound.

  82. All I can tell you, and Jack and Cj can confirm, is I kept complaining about the heat when I was out there last September. I sometimes felt like I was melting.

  83. Truth is, Lejon, I don’t like the cold. My hubby indulges me and the house is set for 23C and I still have a sweater on. I’d rather be in the sweltering heat then the silliness that is winter.

  84. Amy, yup. Have listened to it since its inception and also have the first book (second not available in Canada yet, which seems silly) I knew one of the cast too. He was in the Dex space series they ran in the summers.

  85. Mistress The Energizer Bunny: To surrender to you, might only seem like a little death.

    *mental note: must learn French – better impact with the double entendre*

  86. TEB: Awesome! 😀 (I made my last post before I saw your last one – oops.) I was going through the series in order, but stopped after only 18 episodes. I really want to start it up again, though. Maybe after I get through my backlog of 7th Son episodes from this past fall.

  87. OrGo, I don’t know any French (unless you count a poem about kittens), so any double entendre that way would most likely be lost on me.

  88. Amy, they usually do six episodes of Red Panda followed by six episodes of Black Jack Justice. Then in the summer, they do various shows. Use to be a space serial but this year was a western.

  89. TEB: The film isn’t high art, I’ll grant you, but before there was Firefly, this is the sort of Space Western we had… and where else could you see George Takei, Julie Newmar, and Carel Struycken in the same movie?

  90. < short rant >

    I had blood work done in December, I have yet to get the results from my doctor’s office, and I’ve been billed for the tests.

    Called doctor’s office for results – They don’t have them.

    Ass-hats!

    </ short rant >

  91. Hubby called. Is on the way home. I haven’t even finished my work, let alone thought about making dinner. What am I going to do? I guess it means a later dinner for the bunny household.

  92. Lucky for my hubby, I actually started the spaghetti sauce an hour ago so it could simmer. He can cook the noodles and make the garlic bread. I’m still working.