435 thoughts on “Jack Mangan’s Deadpan #118: Jonathan Deadpan Seagull

  1. Thank you, Essbee.

    I have managed to resurrect Skype and my ID is still valid. I’ve combed through last week’s comments and sent requests to the ID’s posted.

    If you don’t have a request pending from edklein72, it’s only because I didn’t come across your ID in the last comment board…or I actually already had a few of you from before.

    Now, off to the office…..land of no skype and no email.

  2. And the commute is done. Be warned, Deadpan – Jack promised the first part of the show would be the shiny happy part….then unleashes a story of unspeakable horror upon us.

    I had to pull over to the side of the road and curl up in a fetal position in my trunk until I could stop shaking.

    Those poor, poor pants…..


  3. PirateBanana is Mike Bryant, the man also responsible for “Fear and Loathing in Middle Earth,” and “Chicken” (Theme Song to “Quitting Time” and “Crusty Willie Commercial Interlude”).

  4. I pull my copy of Watchmen out last night and started to glance over the first page. I’m going to reread a few sections, good stuff.

  5. Ed, which was the story of horror? The pants? The ducks? Or the hooker?

    Boy, that should have been the name of this episode. . . . Jack Mangan’s Deadpan #118: The Pants, The Ducks, and the Hooker

  6. So I have just decided to watch all of last seasons “Heros” … right now.
    Judging from the reviews I read … I should be able to just FF view through all of the Eps, stopping at the hilites to view as necessary.

  7. “can go either way” “. . . in bed”

    CP: Space Jelly — Galactic

    Nomad Scry: I never told you that I took your advice and got the Skullcandy Ink’d earbuds and am really happy with them!

  8. I’m hesitant to join in on the Skype conversation. I am generally pretty quiet in groups — Cj, didn’t you say something like this last week? I guess I could go either way. What do you all think?

  9. Yeah Heroes, I recommend watching the first two episodes and last two episodes of season 3. You really don’t need to bother with the ones in between.

  10. Excellent!

    And, I agree with Van, EssBee – jump in! I don’t know how much I’ll have to offer to the discussion either, but I expect a good time to be had by all.

    Speaking of which – what do you guys think about coming up with some general topics/questions for this round table to keep things a little more focused?

  11. And, EssBee,

    I think that regardless of who or how many are on the Skype conference, we’ll find that certain personalities will stand out and talk more – that’s just the chemistry of people. I tend to hold back in discussions unless I really feel that what I’m saying is pertinent.

    I like Ed’s idea of topics. Maybe round table questions that are broad for people to jump in and answer as well as quick questions that can be done in a round robin format. I think part of the fun of it though will be making it something everyone gets to be a part of.

    The editing/production staff can always slice it up to make it more listenable if we all talk all over each other. 🙂

    I might be serving tequila shots at my end which means that Jack and Dan may just dissolve into a fit of giggles. You never know. Maybe I should keep my video camera handy.

  12. Hey Pan!

    Lunch is once again et. Except this time the cat didn’t join me. One of my cats is very strange and doesn’t like salmon.

  13. So, if we are going to have a forum discussion (as opposed to a free for all), is there going to be a spot where we can add our questions to ahead of time? (I have 3)

  14. Rhett, I saw all the posters of the characters at our local theater when we saw Underworld. The one concern my husband had is if they are all “pretty” people.

    *NOT REALLY A SPOILER* In the comic, except for flashbacks, most of them are middle age, with typical middle age looks (ie. Night Owl is slightly pudgy, etc).

  15. I believe that most of them will be pretty. I haven’t seen a picture Rorschach unmasked yet, but he should be somewhat dopey looking if in keeping with the novel. I think the Owl and the Commedian came out better looking than their comic counterparts. Although, Ozzy may have faired worse.

  16. I’ve heard good things about Benjamin Button. The only thing to be aware of is it is a slow moving picture (very little action, lots of thought). Also, at almost 3 hours, it is quite long.

  17. Hey.
    You don’t have to be a man to love Manwich. ♬
    You don’t have to be a witch either. It’s true. ♬
    You just have to love a fun tasty dinner. ♬
    And wearin’ some of that dinner on you. ♬

  18. This is the way I go to work (half asleep), go to work, go to work, this is the way I go to work on a cold and frosty morning.

    Morning Pan, time to hit the road and hit the play button to listen to the latest DP.

  19. EssBee – Very glad the ink’d are working out for you. I wish they lasted a little longer, but I don’t think I can complain too much with something that I am actively using for roughly 18 hours a day.

    [waves] Hi, I’m an addict.

  20. I’m counting sleep time as “doing” something with my headphones, since I sleep with the buggers in. It helps distract me to fall asleep quickly, and helps block out the noises of the rest of the family during the day.

    Had I mentioned I’m a third shifter?

  21. Happy bday yesterday, Wolf!

    18 hours is a damn long time, Nomad. I have my iPod going for probably 12, but not w/ earbuds in. I do the little docking station and computer speakers at the office w/ shuffle.

  22. So, we are expecting rain all weekend. Should I go to the Renaissance Festival anyway?

    Actually, I’m going to the (insert hoity toity voice here) Dinner Theater tomorrow night so, maybe Ren Fest next week.

  23. Thank you everyone for the birthday wishes…

    Someone asked my age… Let’s just say I am old enough to know better – To young to give a damn.

    Thanks Rhettro. More to come on the WR front. 3 projects in the editting stages.

    Ed just for clarification… I am not domesticated…just ask my wife.

  24. Relatives called this AM to say there was a power crew in their backyard and they would have power within the hour.

    They expressed surprised because the crew was from Virginia. They have been so cut off that they didn’t know crews had been deployed from surrounding states.
    According to the crew, their part of the county was supposed to see crews until the first of March. However, they live beside a state park that has cabins and someone had made the decision that if they could get power to the park then refugees could be housed there. So the crew had run temporary power off of the newly restored main line to their house.

    For nearly 2 weeks they have been sleeping in layers of clothes that included parkas and ski caps.
    They say they are looking forward to being warm … and being able to wash cloths.

  25. One other note. They said the National Guard had been going house to house in their subdivision a few days ago. Checking on people and hoping my relatives might have any information on neighbors that weren’t answering their knocks at the door.

    I fear that when power is finally restored they will discover a lot of elderly folks who had no place to go and succumbed to the cold. 🙁

  26. … and speaking of dinosaurs …

    The man who admitted while running for President that, “The issue of economics is something that I’ve really never understood as well as I should.” … is now telling the man who won, how to save the economy.
    I find this baffling.

    Given that his inability to grasp the economy was well documented just a few short months ago on the campaign trail – why in the world would anything John McCain has to say about fixing this problem be given more then just a sad smile and a slow shake of the head ?

    … and yet, he seems to be leading the charge against the President’s proposed stimulus plan. It’s like a bad sitcom.

  27. Back in February 2002, KC had a pretty bad ice storm. It took nine days to get our power back on. Luckily we were about to stay at my bother-in-law’s house for the duration. It was one of those factors that motivated us to move to Phoenix. 😉

  28. We went through that too, Rhettro. It took us 8 days to get our power back. In the process, I lost a salt water reef tank aquarium that I had run for about 3 years. Hundreds of dollars of fish dead and not covered by renters insurance. Sucked big time.

  29. So I enjoyed Benjamin Button. It appealed to my sentimental streak, a streak I keep hidden, deep, deep, down inside when I’m watching the latest Hollywood action movie…

  30. CPIMM = Currently Playing In My Mind

    You can usually only fix this by erasing your CPIMM (sing the song for someone else and it seems to just leave you and get stuck in their head) or flashing it (expose it to something more catchy/insipid).

  31. You did, it’s true.

    I just don’t get why a writer would 1) invite fans to “friend” him, and then 2) write a rant like that. Pretty mean!

    Here’s something completely different: Do you guys and girls have nicknames that don’t really fit you? For example, I have an uncle who calls me “Suzie.” My name is Kris, and I most certainly do not look like a Suzie — but maybe did at age 6. I get “Sue”, “Suzie”, and “Suzie Q” from the men in my family, which I think is just kinda weird.

  32. EssBee,

    I don’t have a nickname that doesn’t fit, but there are definitely names that I detest being called.

    I absolutely hate being called “Babe” – my husband does this.. “Thanks, Babe.” “Can you come here, Babe?”

    UGH! I’m not a babe, nor am I the reincarnation of my dead dog whose name was Babe, nor am I a pig from some children’s movie that I’ve never seen.

    I also hate being called “Cheryl” – the name is Cherylyn. It’s one little syllable… “yn” it’s not like it takes that much time to say “yn” after “Cheryl”

    I don’t mind being called “Cj” at all… it’s a nickname I was given with love. Although I have been referred to as “Ceej” at times – that doesn’t seem to bother me either.

    What did bother me was when a friend of mine thought it would funny to suggest a porn movie about my life called…. “Under Ceej”


  33. Here’s an etiquette question for those of you who have better manners than I do.

    There’s a fairly big name educator/author in my field of work who I’m very close with. Her daughter is kind of a fahreak and kind of has the hots for me. Said daughter just sent me a friend request on Facebook. Do I 1) ignore and pretend that I’m a techtard when I see her next if she brings it up?, 2) accept?, or 3) something else?

  34. Ed, I don’t know him either. Maybe we should friend him on Facebook. (I found that essay/bitchfest pretty hilarious, actually)

    EssBee, plz don’t hate me if you follow this advice and it backfires, but I’d probably just let her friend you, then ignore all FB activity from her. Does FB work that way?

  35. EssBee – how old is this person. That would be important factor.
    BTW – if you ever get one of those annoying stalker types, I know this person you can send them to … tell them to use the password “Hi Babe”. They’ll cease to be a problem. 😉

  36. Jack: Yes, you can just ignore all FB contact from them. Chat’s the hardest to ignore, but it can be done if you’re diligent.

    I got my Watchmen novel from the local B&N last Friday. I’ve only had time to read the first few pages, though. I’ll try to read more tonight and/or tomorrow.

  37. Good advice, y’all!

    She’s not a child, she’s near my age – creeping up on 40. I think I’ll take Jack/Van’s advice and just ignore her. I hate to be rude.

  38. Little boxes on the hillside, Little boxes made of tickytacky
    Little boxes on the hillside, little boxes all the same
    There’s a green one and a pink one and a blue one and a yellow one
    And they’re all made out of ticky tacky and they all look just the same.

    And the people in the houses all went to the university
    Where they were put in boxes and they came out all the same,
    And there’s doctors and there’s lawyers, and business executives
    And they’re all made out of ticky tacky and they all look just the same.

    And they all play on the golf course and drink their martinis dry,
    And they all have pretty children and the children go to school
    And the children go to summer camp and then to the university
    Where they are put in boxes and they come out all the same.

    And the boys go into business and marry and raise a family
    In boxes made of ticky tacky and they all look just the same.

    Little Boxes
    by Malvina Reynolds

  39. Mmmmm. BSG. Tasty.

    Hope you all have a lovely weekend. We are headed to Southern CO to visit my better half’s mom and grandma. That = excellent food and being fawned over. I’m into it.

  40. Yup NS, I’m giving the my 701 to my sister and I’m not sure she will like Cruncheee (although I did) because it’s not as friendly as Eeebuntu.

    But if you want to have some more space left on your SSD, Cruncheee is the way to go.

  41. I took the plunge and installed Cruncheee. (crosses fingers) I don’t know enough to fix anything if I mess it up, so… eeek.

    Fluxfluxeee has a nice looking set of icons, but I’m even less familiar with PCLinuxOS than I am with Ubuntu (which I consistently misspell as Ubunto.)

  42. Morning Deadpan!

    It’s 9:30 on Sunday Morning. I have my mouse in one hand and my i-pod in the other. And I’m not afraid to use either one 🙂

  43. Wow, so many links to check when I get home! Off to make my hair more sassy.

    And for those that recall me saying I wasn’t going to get to wear my winter coat. Oh yes. I’m wearing it today. It may not be that cold – but it really is THAT wet out there.

    And thundery… my house windows sound like they are about to come out of the frames!

  44. I’m just gonna say it …

    I don’t care HOW many exclamation points you put in your advert – three, 12 packs of soda for $12 is just simply NOT a deal. 4 for $11 just barely makes it either.

    that is all.

  45. I think I am old inside. I watch Yuja Wang and the first thing that crosses my mind is how much my wrists hurt. Then I wonder how long before her imminent carpal tunnel incapacitates her.

    Still, pretty amazing.

  46. We interrupt this program for a special bulliten…


    …thank you. We now return you to your regularly scheduled Panning.

  47. Actually, it’s a combination of many things. This has been a bad winter all round for people getting sick, here in Calgary. Also, since my husband is a teacher, he is constantly bringing home something from the kids at school. Lastly, have the MA class on Saturday’s testing seemed to be ill, as well, so I also could have got something then.

    Oh well, will skip classes tonight and stay home with a hot cup of Neo Citron.

  48. JOe and Bunny – get well soon!

    Nomad and Van – what language is it you two were speaking above?

    marlo – I dig yellow.

    Cj – cute!

    Is it Monday already? Really?

  49. [drive by2]

    and I used to love the book Johnathan Livingston Seagull. It was my favorite book when I was little and my stupid oldest her went and drew on all the pictures of the birds to make them airplanes dropping bombs. I was so pissed I cried.

    [/drive by2]

  50. So yeah, those of you that liked the Farpoint Recap, what can I say, sorry, thats never coming back.

    Those of you who liked the Wingin’ it Recap and enjoy Stephen Colbert’s mocking of Bill O’Reilly and want a shorter, more concentrated podcast that actually reaches more of Farpoint Media… Well then maybe you’ll want to resubscribe because, while I’m not saying we’re back till I’ve done it consistently for a month, you can expect me to try and put up the new Farpoint Recap 2.0 every Friday or Saturday as I cover the weeks events in the land of Farpoint Media basically the same way I did when I recapped Wingin’ It 3d.

    So there, I’m admitting it… I’m podcasting again. Nothing like a recession/depression to make you want to throw up your hands and say “shit, I may as well be podcasting again.”

  51. TEB: Yeah, Yuja Wang looks amazing. It’s the first time I’ve heard of her, but I’ll definitely look up more. I’ve never seen this piece played on piano. It is even more difficult than I imagined. Wow.

  52. Yes, it is officially Monday.

    Someone should let the Hotties know that these Ipod thingies work in all kinds of good places and that they don’t need to be sitting in front of a computer where they can type commentary in order to listen and enjoy.


  53. Yes another Monday. Ironically, I’m super busy this week at work, but only because of a scheduling snafu. Instead of having a nice moderate amount of work for three weeks, it’s going to be super busy for a week and a half, then I’ll have to worry if there is enough work to keep me employed. On the plus side, the Misses and I did a budget review this weekend, and even if I get laid off, we should only need to make minor budget cut backs to stay out of the red. So I feel better about that.

    Glad to hear you are dabbling back in podcasting Dub. But I’m also sorry to hear that the recession is the impetus.

  54. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aristarchus_(crater)

    I was outside last night grilling some hot dogs and noticed the lovely full moon. I went inside and grabbed my binoculars and saw the moon in stunning detail. I noticed a bright spot on the dark lava basin, so I figured I would look it up on the internet. Turns out it was the crator Aristarchus. I was hoping it was the silver skin of a flying saucer.

  55. Re: Yuja Wang
    I find myself wondering if that video had been slightly sped up. Even if, there is quite some skill there!
    Do you suppose her knuckles heat up from the internal friction?

  56. So before the humiliation of the Mongolian restaurant, I saw Bolt in 3D.

    They use polarisers in the glasses so none of that red/green crap, and ok most of the time it just looks like Viewmaster slides, but certain scenes really seemed to jump out at you.

    Not as good as Toy Story 2, but a fun film (especially if you can see it at a cinema that supports 3D) for big kids of all ages.

  57. What’s the deal with Coraline?

    This blasphemy might get a bunch of rocks thrown at me, but I didn’t think Stardust was very good at all. . . . which makes me extremely leery of Mirrormask. And even, to some degree, Coraline.

  58. I preferred the ending of the book of Stardust to the movie, but still enjoyed the movie.

    The trailer for Coraline looked interesting though.

  59. Oh the 3D specs don’t work on the latest Chuck, which isn’t surprising after reading the Wiki page on the technology used for the 3D version of Bolt.

  60. Coraline does not interest me. It looks scary. I’ve never seen Nightmare Before Christmas either and probably never will. It has the word “Nightmare” right in the title. Nobody can make me. No scary. No thank you. No.

  61. Am I the only one here that just doesn’t care about movies in 3D ?

    In fact, I prefer my movies NOT be in 3D. It exists solely for the cheep “pop out at you gag” and how many times have you left a truly great film thinking, “If only there would have been something in that film that made me want to duck, it would have been worthy of an Academy Award.”

    Nope. I would rather the effort and dollars be put into the script and acting talent thank you.

  62. J0e, IMAX 3D movies are pretty cool. I really enjoyed the Into the Deep one actually. That’s a different type of movie experience though, but pretty amazing to feel like you are in there swimming with the fishes.

  63. I saw Aliens of the Deep in IMAX 3D with my son, back in . . . 05. It was pretty spectacular. But that backs up Cj’s statement. This was a documentary, not a gripping story with actors and plot twists.

  64. OK – I will allow for the “novelty” film but that is because “3D” IS a novelty device.

    I heard an interview with the tech guys who were behind the Chuck episode and the 3D business that went on during the Super Bowl. These guys were all hyped up on their new(again) 3D technology and gushed about how all your TV shows would be like this in the future. The question that immediately popped into my head was “Why?”.

  65. Shhh… I just received my 2nd ever request for a press interview.
    I’m secretly saying, “Squee! Someone likes me!” *giggle*

    Smell-o-Vision – How about the scene in Daddy Day Care where the little boy uses the bathroom all by himself.. *poopy*

  66. Cj: The Nightmare Before Christmas was the first movie of which I was ever a big fan. That started at age nine. There was exactly one moment that I personally found genuinely scary, and it lasted about five seconds. (There are two or three more that some other people might be scared of, but overall it’s much more heartwarming than scary.)

  67. 3D movies just never seem to be as good as you want them to be

    Hugh and I went to see Nightmare Before Christmas in 3D and we walked out after saying.. wow, I really would of much rather just seen the movie on the big screen again without the 3D.

  68. I’ve read Neverwhere and American Gods, which were good and really good.

    But more importantly, w00t 🙂 It’s good to see you guys here. (And thank you for getting the Jonathan Livingston Seagull reference. Sorry about your stupid brothers’ vandalism)

  69. I’m just a total sucker for anything Gaiman has written. It started with the Sandman series and was capped off with Neverwhere. I even read the ridiculous Marvel 1602.


    Coraline is deserving of the attention though. It is simply good and would be so no matter who had written it. The book, that is. I didn’t make it out to see the movie yet. I’ve got my fingers crossed that the fam will be able to get our shit together this weekend.

  70. And before I forget, because I just did, I wanted to vote for more of the …

    I forgot what you call it.

    When TSH live-blog the shows, that thing. I love that. Except I can’t remember the name.

  71. An old old friend of mine, one that I actually knew for more than two years, contacted me two days ago. I’m all mushy with pleasant resurfacing memories.

    So while I am being all mushy, I wanted to say that all of yall are awesome. Thank you Jack for having an awe… no, an *excellent* playground here.

  72. Good day, all. My contact is spotty as we are going on an unplanned internet free adventure at home. Comcast is supposed to have someone out to look at it tomorrow afternoon. It’s frustrating because I have an internet connection by all observable measures….I’m just losing about 90% of all my packets.

    They just better get it fixed by Thursday morning or I’ll have to go Deadpan on their asses.

  73. J0e, I believe the problem has been the freezing, skull-numbing chill across the hemisphere. Maybe if we all huddled our cockles together for warmth. . .

    . . . I think I’ve overstepped my bounds there. . . .

  74. Ooh, a new Love Long and Prosper episode is released. #103: Excellent is the New Awesome. Just thought I’d share.

    About the Watchmen Skype conference, we are thinking a west coast early afternoon time to give everyone the most possible availability. Does this work for most?

  75. Oh yeah……………………………………
    I spaced on mentioning this.

    Maybe 1:00pm, AZ standard time (12:00pm Deadpan Standard Time and currently PST) on Sunday, February 22 for the Watchmania call?

  76. Just an added bit, we are totally open that day so no worries on adjustments at our end. Whatever the consensus is will work for us.

    Some people like to do Oscar night activities and that is the same day too.

  77. It’s shortly after 9pm for you right now, isn’t it, Vanamonde? If my calculations are correct, you’re at Deadpan Standard Time (currently about 1:17ish – – check this comment’s timestamp) + 8 hours? What is a convenient time for you on that Sunday?

    Everyone else speak up too, plz, with your preferred times. I’m easy.

  78. 21:26 now

    For me either anytime after 23:30 GMT or anytime before 18:30 GMT.

    But as I said I can probably arrange things if the 1pm your time is more convenient for everybody else.

  79. You will be missed, EssBee. But – happy birthday to EssBee Sr. I hope you’ll want to/be able to contribute some kind of audio.

    So – does 4:30pm AZ time work then, for everyone? That would be 23:30 Vanamonde Standard Time, 6:30 EST, 5:30 CST, 3:30 PST.

  80. My internets are back out to catch dolphin and sea turtles….or something like that.

    Turns out that both my cable modem was dying…any my brand new router, while all nice and blinking lights everything looks okay on the outside, was apparently very clumsy and dumping my packets all over the floor instead of sticking them in my computer like its supposed to.

    So, cable modem has been swapped out. I’m back to using my old router (that I replaced because has started randomly freezing into a block of ice every few hours) and the new router is going back to Amazon for replacement.

  81. You know, I got concerned scrolling back through with all these messages about how everyone was going to miss EssBee. I’m glad to hear it’s for a birthday celebration.

    I do think it would be cool if she can record some bits for Dan and CJ to drop into the conversation and be there in voice, if not live.

    Any suggestions yet on topics/questions? As something of a closer, I would like to know, after having read the novel, what people are most looking forward to in the movie….or are most afraid of having screwed up in the movie.

    From what I see, it looks like the plan is about 2p central time, which is fine for me.

  82. Ed,

    I think we were aiming for 4:30 AZ time which will be 5:30 Central at least that was the last I saw unless I missed a message.

    I won’t really be able to formulate any questions all my own until I’ve read more, but if you all post questions/topics I’d be happy to keep a shareable document of them.

    I like the idea of posting them on the board because that way (at least for me) I can think about them as I’m actually reading along.

  83. Cj: I agree. I think it is supposed to be 5:30 CST.

    As for questions, I suppose it depends on what format we want to go with: round-table or moderator. If it’s a round-table format then we don’t need questions. Still, it might be nice if we did have a set of discussion points.

    You want us to post them here?

  84. For Cj:

    You’re so gorgeous I’ll do anything!
    I’ll kiss you from your feet
    To where your head begins!
    You’re so perfect!
    You’re so right as rain!
    You make me
    Make me hungry again

    Everything you do is irresistible
    Everything you do is simply kissable
    Why can’t I be you?

  85. Welcome back from internexile, Ed.

    I’ll create a mainpage Deadpan post for suggested Watchmen topics, so we don’t have to scroll through comments about hairy dim sum and Facebook to find the relvant discussion points.

  86. Ah, I must have missed a post myself. Still, 5:30 here in Texas would still work for me.

    ….um, do I even want to know what caused that CPIMM, CJ?

    Of course, now it’s CPIMM2.

  87. As for Aqua’s first hit..the video for that song had a homage to Gerry Anderson’s puppet series at the very beginning (the Aquascope logo).

    So now you know.

  88. NO
    The Cure is not helping me. 🙁
    I grow tired and surly of this cold.

    No one gets to feel good BAH!
    Put this in your CPIMM

    Oh you pretty Chitty Bang Bang
    Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
    We love you,
    And our pretty Chitty Bang Bang
    Chitty Chitty Bang Bang loves us too.
    High low anywhere we go
    On Chitty Chitty we depend.
    Bang Bang Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
    Our fine four fendered friend.
    Bang Bang Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
    Our fine four fendered friend.


  89. My goodness a genre book is actually SHOWN on screen in the lasted Fringe:

    The Land of Laughs by Jonathan Carroll

    We truly are living in the End times.

  90. So just chatting to a friend using the latest version of skype, the audio quality seems quite impressive for a VOIP client, I can hear her spoon hitting the cereal bowl as she munches on Crunchy Nut Cornflakes.

  91. Hello all, our daughter Iris Fey was born February 10, 2009 at 5:45PM CST!

    She weighed 7lb 9oz and was 20″long. The pediatrician told us today she appears in perfect health. Darcy is resting well, and we all should be home tomorrow.

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