Hey folks, if you want to contribute a short Dumbass Memory, Highbrow/Lowbrow, Unrelated Thoguht, Stolen Rap/Hip-Hop Lyric, other funny thing to the Deadpan Podcast Episode 007, then time is running out! I have already begun construction. The final edit will happen sometime late Tuesday evening (I hope). I have lots of content already – but – you’re always welcome to submit more. And hey — the voicemail line is active now, so all you need is your telephone. Call and record your segment right there: 206-350-TOMI (206-350-8664).
Oh – and let’s make this a double-post….. The Devils were eliminated by the Hurricanes today…. There is certainly no joy in Mudville (or Swampville, I suppose, since we’re talking about New Jersey).
What’s all this talka bout Devils and Huricanes. I agree that the devil has brought the hurricane upon New Jersey to punish it for setting up a parallel universe of New York pro spors teams and for awful music acts like Bon Jovi and Bruce Springsteen. NJ does get some redemption credit for being home to Count Basie, Smithereens, and the Feelies. Oh and those Tropical Tomi Japanese dancing girls. They sure know how to shake that sashimi.
My condolences, Jack. It gonna be a long off season.
But hey, theres always the Rockies and DBacks…..
Forget I said that.
Arena Football anyone?
Oh, I guess its still “go Sabres” for me.
Geez I have an AF2 team here in Tulsa, then we have a Double a AA. The Drillers are affiliated with the Rockies. Crap I need to work.
Im not going to make it, I moved into a new dorm room over the weekend, and the internet is all kinds of fucked up becasue the IT people are fucking lazy, and or seniors who graduated. Plus I have a super condensed class I have to study for. Woo for college.
Way to try and go and further yourself Jason.
Collemge is for loozers. I r happy ima unedumacated.
i r noot l00zer, u R stooopid.
i sink you bofe not velly good spelling.
Ah yes, I’m proud that the Deadpan message boards have become a haven for such intellectual, meaningful discourse.
I r a virgin havin nevr had discourse.
ur stioopider.
Jack- it seems you have inspired greatness. Well done.
Hi brow low brow BITCHES! How now brown cow….
Ok, ok mea culpa-all my fault here. I’ll try to confine my future postings to nano-technology, quantum physics and hockey.
OhhOhhhhh Hockey r good.
Eat! Drink! Man! Woman! Geeeg oohh ohho.
ooo Jason like hockey! hockey good!
but Jason no like smart ass Mark…Jason smash! JASON ANGRY!
Broke Back Hockey from the smartass:
The Devils took a 1-0 lead less than a minute after the opening faceoff, when Brian Gionta beat off Ward, a 22-year-old netminder who was pulled after allowing four goals in a little more than one period Saturday. New Jersey won that game 5-1. Then Ward slid in to Gionta, Gionta grunted and said, “you can’t quit me”, Ward then rode Gionta all the way into the net.
Mark say to angry Jason, don’t be angwy watch more Adam Sandler.
No thanks I really dislike adam sandler.
Um….Mark…..um…
That was brilliant/icky.
Whats with all the hate for Sandler? I mean, yeah, he makes bajillions of dollars and sexes up hot honeys because he has the “ability” to play himself in each role, but really if you could wouldnt you take that job in a heartbeat?
A HeeeeeaaaartbEEEET! Lookin’ for a Heeeeartbeeet!
Don Johnson anyone? Anyone?
Adeam Sandler rocks-he is hardly my favorite performer/media icon but he is having tons of fun, makes a lot of people laugh, making piles of dough, employing his friends in every production. Living the “life of Reilly” as me grandma used to say.
Don Johnson in a Ferari big pimpin in Miami…
FYI-actually I love hockey-unfortunately have been away from it for way too long. I had the privilege of watching a WHA afternoon game where Gordy Howe (player coach for the Whalers?) scored a hat trick with his son on the ice. So I too now the joys of testorone/male bonding rituals on ice and off. When we played hockey on the streets of Brooklyn as kids we ran. So technically that would make it field hockey even though we were using ice hockey sticks, and our field was that black kind, made of asphalt.
I feel naked when I dont post for a while.
Wait I am naked.
Avert your eyes Mark Forman!!!! You too Jason!!
What eyes-had to sell mine to pay for this internight connection.
Wha ha!
This site feels lonely without you guys and your nudity.
I should do more senseless posts, like I used to over at my blogspot site.
Hopefully Jimmy isn’t having flashbacks of Dez Moinez…
Oh he probably is Jack H…..
Jack M., I think its very important to post what you feel. Let it out man, desensitize yourself.
Its. All. Good.
I didn’t avert my eyes! I DIDN’T! Curse you Alvie!
and I had a bit all planned and plotted, but now I’m blind. Argh!
Adhering to Alvies request i did not look but I now have the image being beamed to me electronically. Alvie, you look just like a pong game to me. Now please get dressed. Jack I hope your blog header is included in your next country western novel. I thik it would have made old roy Rogers very proud.
J.R., we need to talk…
So Jackie Ganjan you need to fix this Dreadpan podcast mon. You talking de talk but no walkin the walk, I and I we gonna say. Dreadlocks wants to hear the irie sounds the reggae trenchtown sounds mon. Dreadpan podcast, fi.
Breadpan? What’s that? A pan you make toast in? No, then it’d be a toast pan. Hmmm… I’ll have to mull that one over.
Alvie, so talk. I’m blind, I can’t too much else. Darn good thing I can’t type without looking (and apparently spell better than those who can see).
But if youre blind… Then how do… Wait do you… No thats not…
Wait, you can spell?! Nice. Learn me that trick, wont you?
I’m blind so I can’t tell if I’ve got hairy palms.
but I live in San Diego and the palms do grow tall.
wait, those have nothing to do with one another. Hmmm…
I must be roaming in tall cotton with these here posts. Booyah.
I know this site is weird but now it’s turned border line gay now.
All bow down to the Blue Shogun…
Why blue? I wonder.
So Jack how short was this going to be again?
How short? Bout 5′ 10″ I think is what Jack said.
J.R- Tall Palms = Hairy palms.
Because in Soviet Russia, cabs drive you!
Surley you see the correlation. Surley you cant be blind!
Oh thats right…
*a time vortex appears out of nowhere, and a lightred De Lorean flys out*
HOLY CRAP! That was crazy, and why is my car pink?
“I know this site is weird but now it’s turned border line gay now.”
What do you mean “bordler line”, you sexy beast…
Sorry Jason. Its the only color I had.
Well it did help me get away from the dinosaur people, thanks by the way. It was sure lucky that you happened to be in the time and space stream.
I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than to have a frontal lobotomy.
so J.R. minus Tall Palms = Hairy Palms. Hmmm, guess I need to grow some tall palms, but then typing will be a royal pain. Blind and tall palms just don’t seem like they’d mix.
alright the flux Capacitor is almost fully charged. Anybody know a good place to time travel to?
Border, border, border, border line gay
Jack’s queen of the hive many larvae to lay
alvie and jason and mark f worker bees all
bangin and buzzing flying high flying tall
homophobe cowboys steer clear of the deadpan
they know get pretty face broken up by a Coors can
squealing and hissing panties tied in a knot
wannabe macho men nachos covered in snot
Jackie from NJ cranks up Deadpan radio station
the misfits and freakboys make up his nation
weenies and posers make me gag up and puke
let off a “tomi Spherical” and got a nasty rebuke
Some of them is spherical some of them is tomi
the rest of you kiss my ass get down and blow me
pucker up good now pucker for your protein potion
what ever you can’t swallow just rub it like lotion
God dammit Mark! Whatever you be on I want some now! Now Now Now. Bless your rhyming ass!
Jason I would recommend traveling back to when you were 10. Because really, did life get any better than wher you were 10?
Typing would be a royal pain J.R? No no, thats Royal Palm.
I dont even know what Im fuckin saying anymore. Sorry.
Ah, sweet A-love from high atop the mountain trickling down. Agreed on Jason/10 but definitely lose the pajamas. J.R.-please don’t try to palm any of that stuff off on me.
Hockey Night linkage for Jack, Alvie and Jason: http://bbluesman.com/2006/05/18/community-conversation/